26 Stupid Breakup Stories That Will Make Your Eyes Roll. Tabs, Fri., Sept. 4, 2020

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Tabs gifs by your friend Martini Ambassador! How is she so good at these???

Well well well look at that, todayrow is the sixth anniversary of the first day of my first date with my Good Husband from the Good Husband Store (the Wonkette comments). I think we should have a date. But not a 24-day-long date, that is for 41-year-old youngs full of ... well you know what.

Hi Shy! Hiiiiiii!

Sure sure, soldiers who die are LOSERS and SUCKERS, we all KNOW THAT ALREADY, THE ATLANTIC. Oh but maybe we didn't know he said it to John Kelly as they stood over John Kelly's son's grave. So, you know, my Dad would have decked him and my dad is an 81-year-old Jew. Don't know why Kelly's such a goddamn pussy, why you such a goddamn pussy John Kelly?

Russia and the president having the same disinformation message about "mail ballot voter fraud"? Obviously because they are his bitch and do whatever he says, because he is so hard on them! (ABC News)

When the prosecutor is telling Attorney General Bill Barr that nah, we didn't find any voter fraud? Then Bill Barr is pathetic, wait we mean he is a garbage psycho liar.

"Unfortunately, it speaks volumes to the credibility of Attorney General Barr when he submits half-truths and alternative facts as clear evidence of voter fraud without having so much as even contacted me or the district attorney's office for an understanding of the events that actually occurred," [the former DA] added later.

After being asked about Chatham's account, Kerri Kupec, a Justice Department spokeswoman, said in a statement: "Prior to his interview, the Attorney General was provided a memo prepared within the Department that contained an inaccurate summary about the case which he relied upon when using the case as an example."

Ohhh, an inaccurate summary. ALL GOOD. (Washington Post)

Oh boy! Pasco County, Florida, has invented PRE-CRIME! And wait till you read it, WOW what a treat. Thanks Computer! — Tampa Bay Times


Flickr

Why the only Black fulltime journalist at the Kenosha News left.

The large-font headline that topped the Kenosha News website for several hours quoted an unnamed [Jacob Blake rally] participant: "Kenosha speaker: 'If you kill one of us, it's time for us to kill one of yours.'"

That's not right. (Journal Sentinel)

Lawyers Guns and Money collects a Radley Balko thread about the illegal no-knock warrant during which Breonna Taylor was killed. (LGM)

What do you, the mayor, do when your police department decides to show you who is boss? — ProPublica

Who decides who belongs in America? I don't know, you tell me, because you are Dahlia Lithwick and you belong in my brain telling me the things, and so I listen. (Slate)

For the life of me I can't figure out why Trump didn't scrawl his name across those checks, win in a landslide.

Liz thinks it is ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS that the NRA's Josh Powell is trying to come off as the lobby's good guy, he's all "the rest of them were so grifty! I love red flag laws and universal background checks!" She thinks he is in fact not the good guy! (MSN reprinting the New York Times)

Peter Navarro is a fucking asshole. — Washington Post

Bernie Sanders doesn't care if you disagree with Biden on some shit, so does he; the other guy is a menace to fucking life on Earth. Crooks and Liars

Let's all look at The Farmer Ken's East LA food forest! (ABC7)

Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

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Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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