3 U.S.-icans Arrested Trying To Join ISIS, Probably Time To Panic Now

Oh dear god, it's not just Minnesota teenagers anymore! Three grown-up people have been arrested in New York and Florida in an attempted plot to go to Turkey and fight for ISIS in Syria. The Associated Press rather drily reports:

Akhror Saidakhmetov, a Brooklyn resident and citizen of Kazakhstan, was arrested at Kennedy International Airport, where he was attempting to board a flight to Istanbul, authorities said. Abdurasul Hasanovich Juraboev, a resident of Brooklyn and citizen of Uzbekistan, had a ticket to travel to Istanbul next month and was arrested in Brooklyn, federal prosecutors said. Abror Habibov, accused of helping fund Saidakhmetov's efforts, was arrested in Florida.

They are charged with attempt and conspiracy to provide material support. If convicted, each faces a maximum sentence of 15 years in prison.

Fox News gets a whole lot juicier, inaccurately locating all three arrests in New York and adding some spicy details:

Saidakhmetov was arrested early Wednesday at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he tried to board a plane headed to Istanbul, authorities said. Juraboev had plane tickets for March 29 and Habibov helped fund Saidakhmetov's trip, the complaint said.

The two had hopes of joining the terror group and -- if their travel plans were dashed -- had intentions to commit terror in the U.S., the complaint said. Juraboev allegedly offered to kill the president if given the orders from ISIS. Saidakhmetov -- if prevented from joining the terror group -- wanted to purchase a machine gun and shoot law enforcement, the complaint said.

What? Would-be ISIS militants trying to obtain high-powered firearms to kill Americans? You can bet that this incident will finally convince even conservatives and Fox News pundits that something needs to be done, and that a comprehensive system of background checks is needed for weapons purchases. For all Muslims.

And while we're at it, let's start quarantining anyone who's treated Ebola patients again.

[AP / Fox News]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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