CLINTON TOO OBSESSED WITH CHICKENS TO BOTHER RUNNING THE STATE DEPARTMENT: Hillary Clinton, former presidential contender and current secretary of state, can do whatever she wants to with her time and infinite powers. She could have found that lost cargo ship that the Russians had to go looking for instead, or maybe she could be curing the deadly Mexican pig AIDS, but no instead she spends her time talking with and about ladies. "She talked chickens with female farmers in Kenya," reports the Washington Post. This is a disgrace to international diplomacy. [Washington Post]