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A 2020 Democratic Primary Primer, For Kids!

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Did you know that your humble Shypixel loves you all, and wants you to be happy?

He does.

That's why he wrote you this completely original and non-derivative book, which is 100% original and also very unique.


This revolutionary and bold work of literature and wonder of art (none of which was copied) will help guide you through the increasingly complicated maze that is the 2020 Democratic Presidential Primary.

Click the pic so you may read, but seriously, let's not be dillweeds.

So vote Democratic in 2020, with a goat, and ON A TOTE!!! In a jug and with a mug! And if you love our little bits, then you can wear them on your tits!

And once you throw us all some bread, now here is your OPEN THREAD.

Shypixel is a world renowned novice beekeeper, and needs YOUR help to continue buying crap for his bees, so they will make all the honey this summer. Send him and the rest of Wonkette money with Paypal or Stripe.

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Shypixel
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Hello! Here a beautiful open thread for you to not comment all over, so that you don't not comment all over Dok's book club post.

I was gonna drop my Nonnie's recipe for Easter bread in here, but apparently it has to proof overnight and is also for approximately 87,000 people, so not much of a point to that! (Though here it is if you really want it. She doesn't do the egg thing, but if you want, you can put some dyed raw eggs in the braided dough before you bake. And you can add sprinkles, and anise if you're gross and like gross things) I was gonna try and make it myself last night, but have instead opted to just make waffles. Waffles are FINE.

So instead, I shall just leave you with this absolutely terrifying version of The Velveteen Rabbit starring Marie Osmond as said velveteen rabbit. Coincidentally, Marie Osmond is also Nonnie's 2nd arch-nemesis, after Rachel Ray (Rachel Ray because she doesn't pull her hair back when she cooks, and Marie for reasons I'm not entirely clear on but which I believe are related to a Weight Watchers commercial).

THE VELVETEEN RABBIT starring Marie Osmond - full length feature youtu.be


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'Unemployed men queued outside a depression soup kitchen opened in Chicago by Al Capone' -- National Archives

Happy Day Before Half-Priced Easter Chocolate Day, Wonkers! Time to wrap up our Wonkette Book Club discussion of Winter War: Hoover, Roosevelt, and the First Clash Over the New Deal, by Erich Rauchway, a historian at UC-Davis. We're increasingly convinced the book might have just as well been titled Herbert Hoover: Christ, What An Asshole! As ever, even if you haven't finished the reading, jump in anyway -- there won't be a test!

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