A Children's Treasury Of Stupid Newsmax/OANN Sh*t Trump Is Dumb Enough To Actually Believe!

CNN reported last night, in a longer piece about just how insane Donald Trump is getting about all the pardons he might be about to hand out, on the president's current pathetic state of mind:

In his moments of deepest denial, Trump has told some advisers that he will refuse to leave the White House on Inauguration Day, only to be walked down from that ledge. The possibility has alarmed some aides, but few believe Trump will actually follow through.

"He's throwing a f***ing temper tantrum," an adviser said. "He's going to leave. He's just lashing out."


While Trump had begun to privately accept the reality that he lost the election late last month, advisers say Trump has now reversed and dug in deeper — not only spreading misinformation about the election, but ingesting it himself.

"He's been fed so much misinformation that I think he actually thinks this thing was stolen from him," a Trump adviser said of the President.

Even four years later as his ass is on its way out the door, it's still a gut punch to realize that the so-called leader of the free world is so stupid.

So what kind of misinformation is Donald Trump willingly lapping up like a beagle who just found a water puddle full of giardia? Look no further than Trump's two favorite networks the past couple of days, OANN and Newsmax. Yes, Newsmax did call Joe Biden the "president-elect" the other day, but that doesn't mean they still aren't feeding their number one fan his daily bread of bullshit and lies.

Thankfully, Media Matters watches all this shit so we don't have to.


Out of the two Newsmax stories we're going to share, this one is actually less stupid than the other one. But Newsmax host Greg Kelly did look at the camera like a boy who always wanted to grow up to be Lou Dobbs — gross, dude — and say this:

KELLY: Hey, remember Joe Biden's speech yesterday when purportedly, he clinched the Electoral College? He didn't do too much talking. He did more coughing, it seemed like. [...]

I'm concerned because the way it's looking for Joe, his health, I don't think he's gonna make it for Donald Trump's second inauguration.

Yes, on January 20th, I do believe that there is a significant chance that Donald Trump could be inaugurated. Now, I do know that there are smart, informed people who are saying that Joe Biden is the president-elect. Now, I disagree with them, and it's not just a hunch that I'm going on, it's the Constitution.

It's a well known fact about the Constitution that if the president-elect coughs, the loser of the presidential race gets a do-over.

Suffice it to say that this Newsmax idiot is not the constitutional expert he thinks he is.


Told you the second one was stupider.

As Media Matters comments, this is actually deranged. Kamala Harris will resign from the Senate when she damn well feels like it, sometime before she becomes the veep. Maybe she wants to hang around for certain votes. (It's that.) Who the hell knows or cares. Here's the same moron from above, Greg Kelly, on Dec. 7:

GREG KELLY (HOST): I think the Biden people aren't as confident as they are trying to convey. You know, Kamala Harris has not resigned her seat, I'm told, yet in the United States Senate. Barack Obama, when he won back in 2008, he resigned before Thanksgiving. I think they're just keeping their options open depending on what happens.
Yeah, definitely. He's been "told" Harris hasn't resigned from the Senate, therefore she's probably just "keeping her options open." You betcha.

As you can see in the video above, the chyron at the bottom at one point asked, "Who is the lame one?" Probably didn't occur to them that a lot of people would answer, "Newsmax is the lame one."

Newsmax host Grant Stinchfield was banging that very dumb chicken as recently as Tuesday:

GRANT STINCHFIELD (HOST): May I remind you, Harris is a woman who has yet to resign from the United States Senate in preparation of becoming the next vice president and, ultimately, president — if the media gets their way. Why hasn't she resigned yet? Because maybe, like all of us, she still thinks President Trump has a shot at victory if only all the evidence of fraud can be proven and exposed.
This is what fills the president's head at night, and during the day, and while he's being spoon-fed his Big Macs. And it works, because he and his stupid followers are moron enough to believe this shit. It's literally giving him hope in the White House right now. Conspiracy theories that are making you laugh right now because you weren't born yesterday and there are three numbers in your IQ. He's suckin' it up like a mosquito that feeds off dumb.

Which brings us to Trump's favorite, One America News Network (OANN):


Trump has been feeding off silly Kraken stories about Dominion voting machines ever since the election, but the past couple days it's gotten really intense, with him tweeting garbage about how those voting machines just so happened to change "2-3% of Trump votes to Biden," and it just so happened to be in all the states that made Donald Trump the big loser he is today. Oh, for sure, Mister President!

Media Matters's Matt Gertz shares these screenshots, of OANN chyrons just after midnight the other night, followed by a dumbfuck Trump tweet an hour later, in the middle of that very same night:

Media Matters has the skinny on the provenance of this conspiracy theory Trump believes, and what laughable horse shit it is, if you'd like to read all about it. They report that by Wednesday morning, OANN was reporting on Trump's late-night masturbation tweet, the one where he copy/pasted their chyron, as if it were somehow confirmation of the idiot story they spoon-fed into El Dipshit's sad, needy mawhole:

Awesome. Totally normal.

Just a sampling of the braindead daily sustenance being provided to the braindead president who still can't process that the reason he lost is because literally everyone loathes him.

This will all be over in 34 days.

[ CNN / Media Matters / ibid.]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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