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It's really kind of sad that Breitbart editor Ben Shapiro put up this tweet mere minutes after the ultra-conservative Supreme Court approved socialist healthcare in America forever, because it's like he didn't even try to let other people post their own insanely hyperbolic screed before writing the Platonic ideal of one. You know how it's kind of annoying that sportscasters and such use "literally" to mean not "literally" but "I am using figurative language but very, very strongly"? Well, Ben Shapiro has established new heights that make misuse of "literally" literally look like prose that Strunk & White's ghosts would masturbate to. From now on, every paragraph about anything you don't like ends in "This is the end of America as we know it. No exaggeration." But other people were ludicrous too, so let's look at what they had to say.

Probably-not-2012-VP pick Marco Rubio was totally for Obamacare until he found out it was a TAX, you guys. Now he's against it!

Lovable crazy person Pamela Geller watched Obama's victory speech and caught the clue that America is in fact over now:

The real question is, why weren't then tons of Russian flags in the frame? Because that's where we live now: Stalinist Russia.

The Tea Party Patriots (a dumb name, Tea Party members are patriots by definition) put out the following important press release:

"The Supreme Court ruled against the American people today," said Jenny Beth Martin, Co-Founder and National Coordinator of Tea Party Patriots. "The American people overwhelming[sic] oppose Obamacare. Now more than ever it is time for the American people to band together and take our government back. Americans agree with what Justice Kennedy said in the dissenting opinion that 'the entire Act before us is invalid in its entirety.' We are putting all politicians on notice that we will not rest until this law is overturned it’s in entirety."

Wouldn't it be kind of great, if the Supreme Court could just rule against the entire American people, on principle, because we're losers? Give us like three days to get out?

Sadly, Erick Erickson proclaimed that he is "not down on Roberts". But his commenters are! And on Romney!

Yes, imagine what Perry's response would have been! It would have been hilarious, considering he'd have been out of his mind on painkillers. Painkillers that he didn't buy with any of your dag-gummed Obamacare.

Oh, also, lots of people on Twitter swore they would move to Canada, to escape socialized medicine, which we don't even know where to begin with that. Also, Mike Pence, who is a Congressman and the leading Indiana gubernatorial candidate and not at all a fringe figure, said that the Supreme Court decision was as bad as 9/11, but then he apologized, leaving Ben Shapiro the Wingnut Obamacare Freakout Winner, as of 3 pm today.

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Yesterday afternoon, 45-year-old Gary Martin of Aurora, Illinois was let go from his job at the Henry Pratt Company, a factory that manufactures water valves. In response, he took out a pistol with a laser scope and began shooting at random. He killed five people and injured six others who were just trying to make it through the day at the water valve factory, and then the police killed him.

His mother said he was "stressed out." He "seemed fine" according to the clerk at the Circle K where he bought his cigars that morning. His neighbor thought he was a nice guy. Some people were surprised, others were not.

This kind of thing used to be shocking, but it's a story we're used to now. It gets repeated at least once a month. It's just what happens now, and we can't do anything about it because we can't do anything about gun control. This is, the Right has decided, just the price we all have to pay so they can stockpile guns for funsies, and take sexy pictures of guns shoved in their pants. This is the blood that waters their special tree of liberty.

It's fucking exhausting. And stupid. We shouldn't have to live this way. No one should have to live this way. But we do. Why? Because some day some yahoos might want to overthrow the government, which is (of course) a completely legal thing to do, and their "right" to do that must be protected. So it's literally just never, ever going to stop.

Gary Martin, like most other mass shooters, also had a history of violence against women. In 1994, in Mississippi, he was convicted for stabbing one. He should not have been able to get a gun after that. I would like to know how and why he was able to get that pistol with the laser scope that he killed five people with yesterday afternoon. Maybe someone gave it to him. Maybe he bought it somehow. Maybe someone forgot to do a background check. Maybe he bought it from someone who didn't have to do a background check.

I am so goddamned tired of writing this article. I am out of things to say.

[Sun-Times]

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That's right, Wonkers, while we're all up here in America dealing with the terribleness, your Editrix and her fambly are in MEXICO AT THE BEACH, where they will probably stay for a little while longer or maybe they're never coming back SHRUGGIE EMOTICON. But that's OK, they deserve some time to be AT THE BEACH in MEXICO, oh no, don't get NATIONAL EMERGY CARAVANNED!

Yeah, so it's time to count down your top ten stories of the week, like we do on Saturday mornings. Shall we? WE SHALL.

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