Alex Jones Takes Personal Responsibility For 'Pizzagate' Libels Like A Man LOLOLOL Just Kidding LOL
Alex Jones is strong, tough man! Alex Jones eats sausage with no shirt! Why Alex Jones is begging you not to hurt him??? Well, we guess because Alex Jones got one HELL of a lawyer letter. My goodness, isn't he sorry! My gosh, didn't he not say all those things he definitely said! Hey, let Alex Jones point over there at all those "scores" of media outlets who were the REAL libelers, not Alex Jones, definitely nope not even a little!
You will of course remember "Pizzagate," the obviously true story of a child sex dungeon in the basement of a DC pizza restaurant (that has no basement), run by Hillary Clinton and her campaign manager, John Podesta. It was definitely a thing! At least, according to 4Chan, Reddit, Gateway Pundit (home of the Stupidest Man on the Internet, Jim Hoft), and Infowars, the website belonging to one Mr. Alex Jones.
Once a young man decided to "investigate" Comet Pizza's nonexistent child sex dungeon at the point of his semiautomatic rifle, Alex Jones started to take all his videos about "Pizzagate" off the web, so you could no longer hear him say things like
We’ve had reporters on that have been there. They say it’s really creepy because — I don’t have the self-control to be around these type of people. So you want us to cover pizzagate, we have covered it. We are covering it. And all I know is God help us, we’re in the hands of pure evil.
Once he started taking his many videos on the "pure evil" of Pizzagate off the Internet, he changed his story quite dramatically! He
insisted that he was really not all that big on Pizzagate as a thing, posting a video in which he “claimed that he actually said there’s ‘probably nothing going on there’ and his lawyers reviewed his coverage and found that he’s been the ‘most restrained of all the coverage’ in the alternative media.”
But how devious were those bastards?
[I]n the new video, he explains that the whole pizzagate story was a false flag operation to make Alex Jones look bad, and then to BAN FREE SPEECH by setting him up to cover it.
Which brings us to today, and Alex Jones's "apology" (LOL). As ever, we go to the inestimable Media Matters, who watch Jones so we don't have to.
First, they transcribe his whole darn "apology" (LOL), and it is here! He says many lies about how he is "sorry" and it DEFINITELY doesn't have anything to do with any legal claim (LOL) by the owner of the pizza restaurant, who was called a child sex dungeon haver, and whose restaurant was attacked by lunatics with guns.
I want our viewers and listeners to know that we regret any negative impact our commentaries may have had on Mr. Alefantis, Comet Ping Pong, or its employees. We apologize to the extent our commentaries could be considered as negative statements about Mr. Alefantis or Comet Ping Pong, and we hope that anyone else involved in commenting on Pizzagate will do the same thing.
Here’s what we have done to clarify to the public. Months ago, we took down the majority of broadcasts and videos including ones that only passingly mentioned Pizzagate. This happened months before we were even contacted by Mr. Alefantis. [But it did happen like the day after a lunatic fired shots in Comet Ping Pong, while citing Alex Jones telling him to "investigate for himself." -- ed.] Mr. Alefantis objected to portions of seven particular radio/TV broadcasts. We have taken down those seven broadcasts and we have attempted to take down any broadcasts that mentioned Mr. Alefantis or Comet Ping Pong. We have attempted to do so not just on our website but also on social media sites such as our YouTube channel. If Mr. Alefantis has any other objections, we invite him to let us know. [...]
In issuing this statement, we are not admitting that Mr. Alefantis, or his restaurants, have any legal claim. We do not believe they do. But we are issuing this statement because we think it is the right thing to do.
That definitely sounds like a man who is not not trying to get everything he owns taken in a worse-than-Gawker lawsuit.
But is there more! OH BUT YES. And you will be shocked to learn that it is not Alex Jones who was responsible for the child sex dungeon shoot em up at Comet Pizza, it is ... the mainstream media?
But the Pizzagate narrative, as least as concerning Mr. Alefantis and Comet Ping Pong, we have subsequently determined was based upon what we now believe was an incorrect narrative. Despite the fact that we were far from the genesis of this story, it is never easy to admit when your commentaries are based on inaccurate information, but we feel like we owe it to you the listeners, viewers and supporters to make that statement, and to give an apology to you and to Mr. Alefantis, when we do.
And again, ladies and gentlemen, that was -- we got distracted off by MSM on this stuff in D.C. when it was all going on in New York and that’s why day one, I saw it, I saw the media, and I said, “Get off that.” And I did that because we’re not psychopaths, we actually look at what is reality and then focus on that. We don’t go like MSM with their misinfo and just cold-bloodedly spew lies, this person’s a racist, this person’s this, this person’s that. Just because it gets us ahead in what we’re doing, we’re all about integrity, and that’s why we make mistakes by covering MSM, focusing on it, and the huge debate. We will absolutely own up to it, and make right for it, as we just did.
OK, and here is the last tiny thing we want to point out about this: You know how Jones just blamed the mainstream media for Pizzagate, and before that he blamed ... I don't know, false flags for making him spew shit about Pizzagate. Well you know who ELSE he blames for it, which means Alex Jones is not liable? His own reporters. Look:
In our commentary about what had become known as Pizzagate, I made comments about Mr. Alefantis that in hindsight I regret, and for which I apologize to him. We were participating in a discussion that was being written about by scores of media outlets, in one of the most hotly contested and disputed political environments our country has ever seen. We relied on third-party accounts of alleged activities and conduct at the restaurant. We also relied on accounts of reporters who are no longer with us. This was an ever-evolving story, which had a huge amount of commentary about it across many, many media outlets. [...]
Here’s what we have done to clarify to the public. Months ago, we took down the majority of broadcasts and videos including ones that only passingly mentioned Pizzagate. This happened months before we were even contacted by Mr. Alefantis. Mr. Alefantis objected to portions of seven particular radio/TV broadcasts. We have taken down those seven broadcasts and we have attempted to take down any broadcasts that mentioned Mr. Alefantis or Comet Ping Pong. We have attempted to do so not just on our website but also on social media sites such as our YouTube channel. If Mr. Alefantis has any other objections, we invite him to let us know. Two reporters who used to be associated with us are no longer with us. In a recent broadcast, I invited Mr. Alefantis on our program to state what he wanted to, and I again do so here. He has given interviews to many media outlets, and he is welcome to come on our show.
How could Alex Jones be liable for something his reporters wrote on the website he owns and manages, and which he then screamed and shouted about in at least seven videos he had to take down because they were soooo much libel, not that they were libel at all, and LOOK OVER THERE.
In related news, Alex Jones once called Wonkette "fake news." To this day, we've yet to be prouder.
Also, Alex Jones advises the president of the United States of America on what is fake and real.
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