All Crossed Up
We sympathize with our readers who are fearing their mental levees may give way under the category five headspin today's Red Cross story is causing. Let's see if we have all of this right.
This administration, back when they were nominal conservatives, loved themselves some small government. So their vision was to offset government function by leaving the burden to charitable organizations. But just when you thought the government was small enough to drown in a bathtub, actual human beings start drowning, and those that survive wonder why they're paying taxes for a handful of cronies to dine out in Baton Rouge as Shepard Smith loses his shit amid the fetid stank of grim disaster. So then the private-sector charity rides into town to abate the problems of governmental incompetence, which was THE POINT, remember? And some of the employees of that private sector charity looked around and said, "Hey, I hear the lines between looting and finding are at an all-time high rate of blur, and it's not like the government is watching over us, so let's 'find' us some money." And they get found out, and now a nominally conservative Senator from Iowa -- you know, that peerless holyland of political wisdom that gets to decide who the President is -- is telling every microphone he can get in front of, "This will not stand! By gum, the government should have some OVERSIGHT over these charities! We need some REGULATION! Can anyone explain how this happened?!"
Janet Jackson's exposed nipple, by the way, was unavailable for comment.— DCEIVER