Along With George Allen's Presidential Ambitions, Taste and Humor Are Also Causalties of Macacagate


Four days in, and what hath Macacagate wrought?

  • The end of George Allen's presidential ambitions.

  • A week's worth of material for us (thanks, George!).

  • A shitload of bad Internet art.

Please, people, if you ain't got the skills to pay the bills, then stop writing bad checks. Or at least stop sending them to us. A rundown of some of the bad macaca-themed art we've received this week, after the jump.

It's been a banner week for bad art at Wonkette. We've seen cartoons:


The monkey later shat on the T-shirted man's head

We've seen lame jokes:

people should not get down on sen. allen regarding his recent use of the term "macaca" to describe a dark-skinned democrat monitoring his campaign speeches. there is a long, venereal tradition of the use of the word going back to the early years of our great republic. to wit:

"Our cause is noble; it is the cause of macaca!" -- George Washington.

"...the only thing we have to fear is macaca itself." -- Franklin D. Roosevelt.

"Ask not what macaca can do for you; ask what you can do for macaca." -- John F. Kennedy.

"I am not macaca." -- Richard M. Nixon.

"Macaca did not have sexual relations with that woman." -- Bill Clinton.

"My comedic instincts are macaca." - The Author Of This Post

We've even seen bad poetry:

Here's to an Allen named George!

A coward with no Valley Forge,


Swears he ain't gay.)

"Macaca!" is all he'll disgorge.

Now, we love our readers, but, please, STOP SENDING US BAD ART!!! Besides, no matter how hard you guys try, you'll never come up with anything that's worse than what we've already got. You guessed it:


You know it doesn't get worse than that.

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Robbin Young. Fair use so we can all see the boob picture she sent to her 12 true loves.

Robbin Young starred in the Roger Moore masterpiece For Your Eyes Only as the seventh female lead, "Girl in Flower Shop." She also starred in a bunch of Playboys, and the DM's of a humble Romanian hacker who stole her heart. But he was not a humble Romanian hacker, he was 12 Russian military intelligence officers in a trench coat. And now Young has shared those DMs and pictures of her buzzies with the Sun, because that's the one that's fookin' classy.

See how she loved! See how Guccifer ghosted her ass! See how she loves him (them) still! See how she was all up in Seth Rich and shit! (We think Young's judgment might not be awesome.) Also she wrote this "erotic poem," and we're going to need you to read it.

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And now it is time for your weekly reminder that in the Trump era, FUCKING APESHIT OUTRAGE WORKS.

On Monday, Donald Trump, the transactional president who for some godforsaken reason sees Vladimir Putin has his one true father, discussed making an Art Of The Deal with Russia that involved letting Robert Mueller interrogate the Russian spies who hacked America in 2016 (with Russian supervision, of course, in Russia) in exchange for sending Putin whichever American citizens hurt Putin's poor fragile butthurt pansy-ass feelings the past several years. One of Putin's targets is Michael McFaul, the former ambassador to Russia, whom Putin just hates. Hillary Clinton isn't on the official list yet, but give it a few weeks.

On Wednesday, Sarah Huckabee Sanders looked at reporters and told them Trump's people were considering the idea, but hadn't decided yet, because it's so hard for the Trump administration to decide how many treasons to do per week.

But hooray! The White House has decided that, after literally every American with a patriotic bone in his or her body said, "THE FUCK YOU SAY," they will not send Americans to Putin's gulag after all. The Washington Post reports:

The White House announced Trump's opposition Thursday as the Senate prepared to vote on a resolution telling the president not to honor Putin's request, which would have exposed former U.S. ambassador Michael McFaul, among others, to Russian questioning.

"It is a proposal that was made in sincerity by President Putin, but President Trump disagrees with it," White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said in a statement.

Oh my fucking Lord, Shuckabee, did you really type that Putin's offer was "sincere," or did Donald grab the statement after you finished with it and add those words in illiterate Sharpie in the margins, along with "DOES NOT MEAN PUTIN IS NOT MY BEST FRIEND" and "NO COLLUSION"?

By the way, that resolution passed the Senate with flying colors:

WOMP WOMP, Trump! Sorry American freedom and democracy stepped all over your dick again! Guarantee it's gonna happen again! Go fuck yourself! Enjoy the 48 Big Macs you have for dinner tonight! Don't talk directly into the soccer ball Putin gave you, 'less you want it to talk back to you in Russian!

OK post over.

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[Washington Post]

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