Ammon Bundy, the leader of the High Plains Grifters (not to mention Y'All Qaeda) and a favorite of various "patriot" and anti-government groups, has decided to sever his ties to the militia movement after many of his former supporters condemned him and his family for criticizing Donald Trump's demonization of immigrants.

Bundy took to Facebook last week to try to correct -- from a Biblical perspective, as filtered through his Mormon fundamentalism -- the wrongthink of Trump and Trumpism when it comes to hating immigrants, especially Central Americans seeking asylum. Don't go looking for the Facebook post, though; as part of his uncoupling from the militia crowd, Bundy has deleted his account (it's summed up well here, though). Happily, some rightwing loon who thinks Bundy lost his damn mind copied the whole thing to YouTube, for the purpose of posting a long tedious OMG-How-Could-You-Betray-Us?

Bundy pointed out that conditions in Central America really are awful, what with rampant crime and governments unable/unwilling to do anything about it, and insisting that no, people fleeing from gangs tend not to be gangsters. He said families deserve to have their claims for asylum heard, and said the USA can certainly deny entry to any crimers among the asylum-seekers, so it's really unfair to assume all immigrants are criminals:

To group them all up like, frankly, our president has done — you know, trying to speak respectfully — but he has basically called them all criminals and said they're not coming in here," Bundy said in the video. "What about individuals, those who have come for reasons of need for their families, you know, the fathers and mothers and children that come here and were willing to go through the process to apply for asylum so they can come into this country and benefit from not having to be oppressed continually?"

Bundy followed that up with a tweetstorm that we've screencapped here, since he's announced his entire Twitter feed will soon go down the memory hole:

That was enough, of course, for a lot of his former friends to proclaim him a Soros-funded sellout, Deep State operative, and traitor who no longer deserves the support of decent American patriots who are looking for a good chance to dress up in camo and shoot some jackbooted federal thugs. Oh, look, screenshots, since that's all that's left:

Bundy told Buzzfeed reporter Salvador Hernandez he wasn't quite ready for the reaction from his fellow reactionaries, possibly because up until now, the Internet Flying Monkey Brigade had always been on his side:

"I expected to get a decent amount of pushback, but I also believed that I could explain to them why I'd taken those positions and why," he told BuzzFeed News. "But you know, I've always had these kinds of thoughts that people were not really listening to the principles of things, that they had aligned with me for some other reasons, and that some of those [reasons] are good and some of those might not be, but this last video kind of confirmed that."

And Bundy's completely right about the fact that his family's little rebellion against the federal government attracted a lot of hangers-on who didn't "get" their crazy beliefs in a very special copy of the US Constitution that only the Bundy family understands. There was enough overlap between the general anti-government beliefs of the "patriots" and the 3 Percenters and Oath Keepers and Constitutional Sheriffs and other assorted sovereign citizen nutjobs that they could all get along just fine, but the Bundys were on a mission from God, and as rightwing Mormons, they're a bit more attuned to the plight of refugees from a scary overbearing government, even if it isn't the US government.

That was clearly part of what bugged "Allahpundit" at the rightwing "Hot Air" blog:

Doesn't the Bible instruct Christians to be Good Samaritans? Yes, says Bundy. More than that, though:

"You need to read and understand the scriptures. Migration to the Unites States is a huge part of the actions of the last days. We are to teach them the gospel as they come, love and welcome them."

Not even Bundy's practical argument -- we should be nice to refugees since, when the corrupt US government collapses, we patriots may all end up being refugees ourselves -- was convincing to "Allahpundit," who vowed to drink a little extra at the very stupid idea that Americans should "Admit Hondurans and Guatemalans en masse today and hopefully Honduras and Guatemala will admit Americans en masse tomorrow."

Now, before you start praising Ammon Bundy for finally seeing the error of his ways, don't be fooled: He hasn't changed at all. The guy is still very much an anti-government radical who thinks it's perfectly fine to defend your fake claims to federal land by training guns on BLM agents, and that no laws but God's are really legitimate. He's not quite an open-borders advocate, but his thinking on immigration is very much informed by both his Mormonism (let 'em in and Gospel 'em up before the End Times) and by his rejection of all government, which means the federal government shouldn't mess with the individual liberty of Messicans, either -- plus, they're a good source of cheap labor, and generally more religious than corrupted secular Americans. As he told Hernandez,

"I believe President Trump, the best way I could explain it is that he's a nationalist, and a nationalist in my view makes the decision that best benefits the nation, not the individual," Bundy said. "That is not freedom, and that is not what America was built upon."

When it comes to his core beliefs, Bundy remains bugfuck nutso about his theocratic version of extreme libertarianism and the primacy of the Second Amendment in making all people free. He just thinks Trump followers have joined the wrong cult:

"I think they have their leader," he said. "I think, you know, President Trump is clearly their leader, and I think wherever he tells them to go, they'll go."

Heck, Bundy even worries that Trump followers could be a bit like the people who followed Hitler in the 1930s, which sounds awfully enlightened of him until you remember he also thinks federal ownership of land and taxation are also exactly like Nazi Germany.

And while Bundy's leaving social media, Hernandez advises us Bundy is considering writing a book about this whole affair, which might certainly make for some interesting Wonkette posts. We aren't about to wish Ammon Bundy farewell, anyway, because Crom knows he'll be back and seizing federal wildlife refuges again if Kamala Harris becomes president.

[Buzzfeed / Hot Air / St George News]

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Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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OOH BOY HOWDY, The Federalist is on fire this week! Just this morning we told you about the hilarious Federalist column where one neo-Nazi's mom and dad are Democrats, ipso facto QED NEO-NAZIS ARE THE REAL LIBERALS, FUCKERS! Is America's dumbest woman whose name doesn't rhyme with Cara Snailin' over there being a total fuckin' Mollie Hemingway right now? Sadly, she blocked us on Twitter, so how could we possibly know? The answer is WE DON'T CARE.

But now we have a gem of the Federalist genre, an article written by a whiny-ass gay quisling conservative, who would like to chew on his blankie and whine about how much harder it is out there for a conservative than it is for a gay person. This is a subject we happen to have some knowledge about, because we are super gay! And we know a lot about conservatives, both firsthand -- being subjected to them every single one of our almost four decades of life -- and also from covering extremist right-wing Christians for a very long time. Particularly the kind that tell young, impressionable, vulnerable gay kids that they need to pray away the gay if they want Jesus to exercise some self control and refrain from sending them to a fiery hell for all eternity.

We clicked on the article with high hopes. See if you can spot why:

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pic via Glamour Shots, we mean this dude's old website

The House Education and Workforce Committee was all set to have a hearing today all about the horrors that a higher minimum wage would wreak on the economy. Horrors like rich people being slightly less rich. Horrors like business owners claiming they will have to fire people and charge $15 for a McChicken if forced to pay workers a living wage, which they won't actually do because no one will buy a $15 McChicken and they would go out of business if they tried that, and they already don't hire more people than the bare minimum they can get away with. Horrors like poor people not being "motivated" to work harder and get better jobs that do not pay them an amount no human being could possibly live on.

Alas, as Politico reports, it was not to be, as committee members discovered their big witness for the hearing, San Diego State University economist Joseph Sabia (pictured above in a Glamour Shot from his archived website), was kind of a wacko.

Sabia, as it turns out, once had a blog called "No Shades Of Gray," in which he wrote many columns of an extremely homophobic and sexist persuasion. In one of these columns, in 2002, Sabia was very mad about one man's lawsuit against several fast food giants for contributing to his health and obesity problems by failing to disclose the nutritional information of the food they sold. In retrospect, I think most people are now on board with these chains being required to post calorie counts and other nutritional information, but in 2002, Sabia was convinced that requiring them to do this would be an assault on freedom for all Americans everywhere. His response to this was to try and attempt a Jonathan Swift posture and suggest taxing gay sex, which he claimed leads to "disastrous health consequences."

Because sure, that's the same thing, basically.

In gay sex, we have an activity that is clearly leading to disastrous health consequences. What rational person would engage in this sort of activity? There is only one solution - let's tax it.

"Come on, Sabia," you say, "how are you going to enforce these taxes? Are you going to send government officials to peep into everyone's bedroom?"

Eventually. But first we have to mount the assault on Big Gay (no, I am not talking about Rosie O'Donnell). We can tax gay nightclubs, websites, personal ads, sexual paraphernalia, and so forth. Talk about a sin tax!!! We can cripple gay-related industries and get them right where we want them. All gay clubs will have to feature huge, flashing warning signs like "CAUTION: Entering this nightclub may increase your chance of contracting STDs and dying."

Big Gay clearly lures people into trying their "product" without discussing the risks to mind, body, and soul. The average Joe on the street does not understand all of the possible bad outcomes. I can almost hear him now:

"They said '100 percent hotties.' I thought that meant it was fun. I thought gay sex was OK…Now I have all these diseases. Big Gay has wrecked my life."

In the immoral words of Warren G, "Regulators!! Mount up!"


In another 2002 article, classily titled "College Girls: Unpaid Whores," Sabia laments that feminists have led college girls to stop trying to be like the Holy Virgin Mary and instead to aspire to be more like that hussy Ally McBeal.

No, really.

As women have strayed from the church, they have replaced what is holy with what is temporally pleasing. For Catholics, the model woman is Mary, the virgin Mother of God. She is beloved by the faithful for her unflappable devotion to and trust in God, her nurturing of the Son of Man, and her deep love for all humanity.

Today's college girl looks to Ally McBeal, the trollops of Sex in the City, and the floozies on Friends to set their moral compasses.

The sad truth is that college girls are so desperate to find love that they are willing to degrade themselves to get it. But true love can only be understood in the context of the Word of God. Any other notion of "love" is secular and, by definition, limited and finite.

Not only that, but instead of going to college to find a husband, they have boyfriends. Boyfriends they have S-E-X with. And sometimes, not even that. Sometimes they have sex with people just because they want to have sex with people, and not even in exchange for Valentine's Day cards or money!

Additionally, other sex-based relationships have become commonplace. In recent years, a new and disturbing arrangement known as "friends with benefits" has emerged. In this arrangement, men are not even forced to perform the normal duties of boyfriends, i.e. flowers, Valentine's Day cards, rides to the abortion clinic, etc. Instead, girls consider these guys "just friends" whom they happen to screw every now and again. No strings, no attachments, no dinners. Just sex when they feel like it.

This type of arrangement is the next logical step in the direction that young women have drifted in the last few decades. These women have become unpaid whores. At least prostitutes made a buck off of their trade. These women just give it away.

How cute! He was like the ur-incel, basically.

Anyway, following the discovery of the posts, the House Education and Workforce Committee's GOP communications director Kelley McNabb told Politico that "members were uncomfortable moving forward on the hearing." A more optimistic person might think this was a step forward, that maybe those committee members actually thought it was bad to suggest that being gay means being a disease-ridden monster or that college girls are whores, but it's probably more to avoid embarrassment than anything else. Guess they'll have to start from scratch and find a crappy economist who will tell them what they want to hear about the minimum wage but who doesn't have an embarrassing Geocities blog in their past. Good luck with that!


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