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Anderson Cooper, Dan Savage, Anderson Cooper's Mom, And Some Cunnilingus (No Verb Necessary)

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In what may be the best -- at least the weirdest -- ripple effect of the Rob Ford strange-o-palooza, here are Anderson Cooper and Friend of Wonkette Dan Savage talking Thursday about the best news stories of 2013...until the conversation takes a turn for the disturbing. Or the awesome. We can't decide. Cooper asked Savage what he thought the best scandal story of the year was, and Savage went with Rob Ford's series of very public embarrassments, adding “I love a good cunnilingus joke on the evening news.” And really, who doesn't?

And then Cooper had one of those moments where he was reminded of something and said so:

“My mom once wrote a romance memoir about men she had dated -- and I use that term loosely -- and she described one guy she was currently dating –– my mom was 85 at the time –– as the Nijinsky of cunnilingus. And she made me proofread the book.”

Extra points for Cooper's coda to the story: "I said, "Mom, I don't know anything about modern dance." ("Or cunnilingus," added one of the other panelists.)

Mediaite's Josh Feldman did his best to pretend astonishment: "Thanks, Anderson! Thank you SO MUCH for that image! Really, just… wow." But why be squeamish about this? Anderson Cooper's mom sounds like a hoot. Any woman who can find a Nijinsky of cunnilingus at 85 and get her gay son to mention it on national teevee should be an inspiration to everyone, and probably should have a statue built in her honor. It certainly beats flocking to restaurants wearing red hats.

Update! Editrix here. It turns out I cannot even sleep in till all of 6 a.m. my time without the good Doktor Zoom putting up posts about Gloria Vanderbilt without even knowing they are about Gloria Vanderbilt! And Lisa looked at the post and did not know Gloria Vanderbilt was Anderson Cooper's mother EITHER? Just whom have I hired here? The staff of THOUGHT CATALOG? Anyway, shame be upon our heads, and we now return you to the post in progress. (Good red hat club joke though, Dok.)

Feldman dutifully noted that this was only the second strangest Anderson Cooper/oral sex moment of the past year (OK, Kathy Griffin trying to blow him on live TV was technically in 2012):

As of press time, we had not yet heard back from our bookie on the over/under for Anderson Cooper oral sex stories in 2014.

[Mediaite]

Follow Doktor Zoom on Twitter. Some call him the Barney Fife of cunnilingus.

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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