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At Least We Don't Wear Togas, For Now

Hey everybody, did you hear that America is just like Ancient Rome before the tragic collapse of that civilization when the ruling class and corporate elite fled to the Orient? A shocking new book gives all sorts of examples:


* There is so much "social decadence." Just look at the 140 million teen-aged whores on MySpace, or that celebrity heiress who fucks horses on YouTube.

* Hey wait, where did all of our military guys go? OH NOEZ!!!1!

* Who are all these non-Americans taking over our cities? Oh shit, they are Germans dressed in animal skins, and speaking Spanglish.

* Our leaders just sat around laughing while New Orleans was deliberately destroyed and all the black people were drowned, just like in Pompeii.

* When Rome finally fell, the entire public sector had been transferred to contractors and all political action required a legal bribe called a suffragium.

* "Jack Abramoff" means "Halliburton" in Latin.

The Sack of Washington [Vanity Fair]

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It started with them damn hats. (Image: Wikimedia Commons)

A guest post by "Knitsy McPurlson," which we suspect is not a real name.

Yr Wonkette is not the only website run by brilliant peoples unafraid to poke people with sharp, pointy sticks. Ravelry.com – a website for knitters, crocheters, and other folks interested in textiles and fiber arts – is poking people with knitting needles, which are very sharp indeed.

This past weekend, Ravelry.com's founders showed the world how easy it is to de-platform white nationalists and racists when they banned all "support of Donald Trump and his administration" from their website, concluding they "cannot provide a space that is inclusive of all and also allow support for open white supremacy." Seems like people smart enough to decode a knitting pattern are also smart enough to decode Trump's not-so-hidden message of racism and white nationalism.

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One day, God willing, my grandchildren will click open their history textbooks and read about the Central American migrant internment camps. They'll learn about sick kids, locked in cages, kept hungry and dirty and cold for weeks on end, and they'll be horrified.

"Bubbie," they'll say, "how could this happen in America? How could there be toddlers sleeping on the ground without blankets, without soap or toothbrushes to clean themselves?"

"I don't know. I wish I had done more. I'm ashamed," I'll say. We will all have to answer for this atrocity. But some of us will have to answer more than others. Not just the archvillains like Stephen Miller and John Kelly, but the people who kept right on doing their jobs, even as those jobs morphed into defending concentration camps.

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