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Barack Obama So Bored of Wingnuts Calling Him Muslim

  • Glenn Beck gathered 90,000 of his saddest friends from the senior center to have a picnic lunch on MLK's grave Saturday, which was just a way for Glenn Beck to say to Obama, "When I called you a 'racist,' what I meant was some kind of vague crap about how you are not as Christian as I am, because I am some kind of 'Mormon Convert,' whatever that is." Obama ignored this entirely, and instead told a secular teevee news host that it just doesn't matter if some people who already hate black people prefer to just call the president a "Muslim" instead. But why do the Muslims all love Obama so much? It's not like he quit bombing Afghanistan all the time! It's not like he closed the American Torture Prison at Guantanamo Bay! So maybe Obama really is a secret half-muslin, because what else could explain his sky-high approval ratings with the very people he tortures and bombs, daily, for America? A shocking 78% of American Muslims approve of this guy, even though his very rare visits to church were, in fact, to a "Church of Christ" in Chicago. That doesn't sound like a very good mosque name, "Church of Christ." [Business Week/Chicago Tribune]
  • America didn't have any huge mass shootings over the weekend, so the Slovak capital of Bratislava had to come through with the terrible violence and bloodshed. Zavolajte políciu![CNN]
  • Do things look a little different around here? Welcome to the all-new Wonkette! Because this is the launch of a redesign, expect things to be clunky and occasionally screwy and sometimes just plain focked up while we slave over a hot computer to get everything -- this entire seven-year-old website with its 30,000 posts and god knows how many blingees and other filthy -- converted to the new formats. If you see something we should fix right away, please let us know on the tips line. And thank you for your patience.
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