After veritabledays of speculation about where Barack Obama would deliver an inspirational speech to the German people -- the sausage barn where JFK declared he was a donut? the Reichstag? Angela Merkel's bosom? -- we finally get an answer. He will speak in front of Berlin's "Siegessaeule," or Victory Column! According to Politico, it is "a symbol of Prussian military dominance in the 19th century." Barack Obama will spread his message of hope and peace from atop a giant War Dildo. [Welt Online via Politico]