Battle of the Mag-Blogs
Boy, we sure can't bring ourselves to have an opinion about that whole Danish cartoon thing. Believe us, we tried. We briefly considered posting nothing but crudely-drawn cartoons of Mohammed making fun of hospital bed-bound amputee American soldiers (caption: "Christ, what an asshole."), as that would finally unite Islamic Militants and the American Military establishment against a common enemy, but eh, we're lazy. And a little tipsy. So we decided to take our cue on how to respond from our Opinion Leaders who blog in the name of their various money-losing magazines.
First up, those scamps at the National Review'sThe Corner. From what we could see, in between book-plugging and discussions of Locke's definition of "freedom," they link to Muslim cartoons about Jews, thus demonstrating the always-effective "they started it" argument. We would've investigated further, but we were distracted by this:
The mathematical formula for popular culture, music or art is:
% of music (art) included is equal to the the remainder of the % of the sociology subtracted from 100%.
Hip/hop is about 99% sociology. Most rock and roll is about 85% sociology. Even Springsteen is at best 50% music. Miles Davis is about 95% great music. And Stravinsky The Symphony of Psalms is 100% music, no sociology at all.
Whoo! The '50s Never End at the National Review! Someone thaw Buckley and we'll groove to some sweet, swingin' Wagner (110% music, if you get my drift -- not even a hint of Negro)!
Surely we'd find something Good and Proper to think at The Nation. Why, they'd just told us the other day that they had an exciting new blog that promised to be "off-the-cuff" or "unfiltered" or something like that called "The Notion" (geddit?). So we stopped by, and, good sign -- there was a Very Good Opinion waiting for us right in a post title!
But when we actually read the post, we quickly saw a long paragraph that started with "It's complicated, but..." and we started to miss The Corner.
Scraping the bottom of the ideological barrel, we came to rest, at last, with Reason's Hit & Run. They had some WILD and CONTRARY opinions that would casue a ruckus at a cocktail party. We think. Our eyes were starting to glaze over. But we did like this:
For the record, if you have pictures of the president of Denmark sucking other men's bottoms, we'll be happy to publish those too. Sexually explicit pictures of Denmark's Crown Princess Mary are even more welcome. In fact, even if you've got pics of Princess Elisabeth sucking a man's bottom, we'll run those just for shock effect.
So. Guess we're Libertarians now. We've never been prouder to have no health insurance!
CONCLUSION: Socialists need a better web presence. Where's the Daily Worker's "Peace, Bread, Blog!"?