Beer Boycott: The Hardest Decision Conservatives Ever Had to Make
The first email we got on the subject (we're on all the psycho xenophobe mailing lists) was headlined "The End of Miller Time." We read it and had no clue what the hell they were talking about:
For some time we have known there are subversive corporations in our midst. One such corporation is the Miller Brewing Company which donated a substantial sum so that illegal aliens could takeover and demonstrate in our streets. By supporting those who break our laws to court Latino customers, Miller does not deserve the support of any American citizen--it's time to put an end to Miller Time and let the boycott begin.
We admired the opening sentence and imagined it being read by a young Orson Welles. Then we gave it no more thought. But it keeps coming. Learn the boycott details, or our hazy, alcohol-soaked recollection of them, after the jump.
Since then, we've received about four hundred more emails on the subject, and we eventually learned that yes, Miller "sponsored" rallies in Dennis Hastert's Illinois district. That upset the little troll, so, uh, it's boycott time. Now, there's finally a website for all your beer-boycotting needs. It's got the catchy name "Illegal Immigration National Miller Boycott Site" (or "IINMBS," pronounced "iinmbs"). And some awesome merchandise!
But it's not just Miller Lite (and Icehouse, Milwaukee's Best, Leinenkugel, Mickey's, Olde English, and Skyy) that we're giving up for good (we'll be goddamned if we're givin' up High Life, though). Oh no, sir. Because lovable lunatic Michelle Malkin learned recently that even Anheuser-Busch "supports pro-illegal alien policies." Michelle's advice? "So if you're going to drink beer [and you clearly are -ed], make it yourself."
In other words: expect reports of exploding home stills to skyrocket in the coming weeks.
Brew Your Own Beer [Michelle Malkin]