Believe It Or Not, Wonkette's Weekly Top 10 Is Walking On Air
Put on your superhero masks, Saturday morning cat people and gardeners and daydrinkers, we've got a Top 10 chosen by a cabal of supervillains, and we're GOING IN!
10. Kayleigh McEnany Says Guy Buffalo Cops Kicked Sh*t Out Of Is Big Pottymouth, So ... Um ... YEAH! Evan wrote this, title seems self-explanatory, no?
9. Cop Saves His Favorite Special Proud Boys From Getting Teargassed Like Commoners. Robyn on TRUE LOVE beat.
8. We Guess We Should Say Something About This 'Lady G' Business. Evan tells you it is perfectly fine to out any supposed closeted senators who might hypothetically exist; just don't be gross with gay jokes if you are not personally the geigh.
7. Incel Wanted To Blow Up 'Hot Cheerleaders,' Blew Up His Own Hand Instead. This one was a bummer, ROBYN.
6. Just What We All Need Right Now: Ivanka Trump Talking About Her Personal Growth. Much less of a bummer, ROBYN.
5. Is This Post About Sex? Or Is It About MADE YOU LOOK? Evan tricked you, it is about sorry we forgot to cover coronavirus for a while, we have been pretty busy.
4. Joe Biden Did A Gaffe, Oh Wait No He Didn't, GET HIM ANYWAY, NEW YORK TIMES! Evan again, probably #rigged it.
3. Buffalo Cops Crushed To Learn They Can't Go Around Beating Up Old Men. There, there is a SER story, about time.
2. Ben Shapiro Says His 'Space Of Comfort' Has Been Destroyed By Politics In Sports. Is there a shorter phrase for that, Robyn?
And there you have it, 10 posts by Robyn, Evan, and SER. What are Dok, Liz, and I, chopped liver? No, we are CUPCAKES.
not a cupcake! www.youtube.com
There you go, this week's top 10 Wonkette stories as chosen by a cabal of supervillains! You have been so good, and there are so many new ones among you (we think Facebook stopped throttling us once they decided to let Trump go wilding), so after your donation widget because Wonkette is funded ENTIRELY by YOU
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if you enjoy sending checks in the mail because you are Old, you new folk may learn about the Wonkette Heiress and Superhero Donna Rose/Rosita Thorn via pictures of her BANGER fifth (or thirty-seventh) birthdaystravaganza on Thursday. Prepare to LOSE YOUR MINDS.
Donna Rose birthday menu
A breakfast pizza with scrambled eggs and bacon, it was fucking delicious
Donna Rose supervises the planting of her fairy garden
Bike ride with Daddy. Note rare photograph with all four dogs in frame.
Donna Rose's beauty salon with mama.
Donna Rose and PRESENT!
Donna Rose welcomes you to tea.
Good stepson Keifer.
Shy has a spot of tea (on his shirt).
Look at that motherfucking tea party.
We pooped out for "craft," "science experiment," and "dance party," and we're still knackered a full day later. Now we're taking off Monday too to go and fetch son and GRANDDAUGHTER. Pics or it might not have happened GOODBYE!
Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.