Ben Carson Removes Own Brain On Live TV While Discussing Trump, Racism

Post-Racial America

During a period of racial unrest, the person no one wants to hear from is Ben Carson, HUD secretary and the most embarrassing black man alive. CNN's Jake Tapper interviewed Carson Sunday, and the first question was about retired Gen. Colin Powell's accurate assessment of Donald Trump as a liar who's “dangerous for our democracy." Carson's response was a blatant lie.

CARSON: Well, I don't generally, as you've probably noticed, get into demonizing other people. I'd much rather talk about policies and solutions. I admire Gen. Powell and he's certainly entitled to his opinion and the way that he wants to conduct himself but I don't find it particularly useful to demonize people.

During his hilarious 2016 presidential campaign, Carson frequently bashed Barack Obama. He claimed the first black president wasn't “really black" because white people raised him, and it “was a stretch" to suggest Obama “identifies with the experience of black Americans." That was a gross personal attack on Obama's identity. It was wholly unrelated to policy, even stupidly, like when Carson said out loud, in public, to other people that “Obamacare was the worst thing to happen to the nation since slavery."

But how about literal, actual, definitive "demonizing"? Here's what Carson said about Hillary Clinton.


Powell wasn't “demonizing" Trump. He just said true things about him. Serving under three Republican presidents, including George W. Bush, was about as far to the cliff's edge as Powell was willing to take his dignity and self-respect as a black man. Carson, meanwhile, is holding Trump's hand and going full Thelma and Louise with a scumbag president most black people loathe.

Tapper presses Ben Carson on Trump's retweet about George Floyd

Carson did call the police killing of George Floyd a “blatant and callous murder," which it was, and expressed pride in the actions of “peaceful protesters." That was a rare and brief moment of lucidity. He quickly moved on to claiming that Black Lives Matter activists aren't currently concerned "about young black men killed in the streets of Chicago." Black people do care about all forms of violence against us. It's conservatives who only ever mention Chicago as a counter-point to state-sanctioned violence. Al-Qaeda was not in a moral position after 9/11 to argue, “Look, we get you're upset about the towers, but what about all those school shootings? Fix that and then call us."

Tapper asked Carson about Trump retweeting videos of conservative assholes pissing on George Floyd's memory.

TAPPER: I know you didn't retweet this, but the president did. Does that help the nation heal?

CARSON: What will help the nation heal is if we will engage in dialogue together. Let's not make the solution be a Democrat solution or a Republican solution. Let's make it an American solution and recognize that our country is extraordinary ... No one from the outside can brings us down, not China, not Russia, not Iran. No one can, but we can destroy ourselves internally ... A house divided against itself cannot stand.

Carson drifted into a mindless stump speech lifted from the "Big Book of Platitudes." When pressed on the fact that Trump was actively dividing the nation and denigrating a dead man like he was a former political opponent, Carson shared the reassuring news that we were going to "hear from the president this week on this topic in some detail." Oh joy!

CARSON: I would ask you to reserve judgment until after that day.

I'm not reserving shit, because I'm not dumb enough to believe Trump is capable of delivering a sensitive, unifying speech on anything, least of all racial violence. This is the same president who produced a Don Jr. and an Ivanka.

Tapper asked Carson if he believed there was systemic racism in law enforcement, and Carson answered that he'd grown up in a time when there "was real systemic racism," not this fat-free, ultra-pasteurized racism we're offered today.

CARSON: I remember as an eighth grade student, I was the only black student. I got the highest academic achievement and the teacher got up and berated the other students. They weren't trying hard enough because a black kid was number one.

That's a bummer, but a police officer pressed his knee into a black man's neck until he died. When I was in second grade, white kids could set fire to the classroom and get a sticker, but the teacher would send me to the principal's office for spilling milk at lunch time. However, cops burst into Breonna Taylor's home while she was sleeping and shot her dead. That's 2020.

Carson would've been in eighth grade in 1964, and there was a lot of racist shit going on beyond his gross teacher, who probably voted for Trump if she was still alive and not burning in hell.

CARSON: That kind of thing was not uncommon when I was growing up. It's very uncommon now.

There is significant institutional racism in our school system. Carson defines racial progress simply as white people being less vocally racist — although he's also condemned “political correctness," and most of his conservative buddies would defend his awful teacher: “We don't know that she's racist. She just said one dumb thing. Maybe she was trying to motivate the rest of the class, etc."

CARSON: We need to deal with some of the issues in the police department but this is an easy time to do it. We have policemen who are rogue, but the vast majority of policemen are wonderful.

This weekend, police officers in Buffalo gathered to applaud two officers who'd been charged with assaulting an old man at a protest.

CARSON: You have some who are rogues and they can go from one jurisdiction to another jurisdiction and nobody does anything about it.

Yeah, that sounds like a systemic problem there, slick. We're done here. Get off our TV now and please enjoy your final few grifting months in HUD before President Biden fires your stupid ass.

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He's on the board of the Portland Playhouse theater and writes for the immersive theater Cafe Nordo in Seattle. Tickets are on sale now for his latest Nordo collaboration, "Curiouser and Curiouser," an adaptation of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" and "Through the Looking Glass." It promises to feel like an actual evening with SER (for good or for ill).


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