Biden Better Pick S.E. Cupp’s Ideal VP Or She’s Writing In Ronald Reagan’s Frozen Head
Unemployment is at sepia-toned Great Depression levels. The coronavirus is surging out of control. It's so bad some conservatives are almost, possibly, maybe considering not giving another term to Donald Trump, who never should've had a first term on account of his being Donald Trump.
S.E. Cupp is one of those “reasonable conservatives" we hear so much about. (According to her Twitter bio, she's also a “Jeopardy" winner. Good on her.) The New York Daily News ran an op-ed from her Thursday titled “My vote for Biden hinges on his VP pick."
Cupp doesn't live in Michigan, Ohio, or Florida, so it's unclear why we should give a fuck whom she votes for now, especially given her track record.
CUPP: After nearly four years of Trump's chaos, incompetence, corruption, narcissism, nepotism, racism, authoritarianism and nihilism, I'm very seriously considering voting for Joe Biden, rather than write someone in, as I did in 2016.
Wow! Cupp is “very seriously considering" voting against President Klan Robe. She mentioned that in 2016, she wrote in someone's name rather than waste her vote on Hillary Clinton, who was so scary with her emotional stability and overall competence.
Here's the thing about writing in some rando's name. It's bullshit. It's not really voting because that's not how our electoral system works. Someone whose name you have to literally write on the ballot yourself hasn't campaigned effectively enough to win the Electoral College. Either Clinton or Trump was going to be president in 2016. Those were the only options. It doesn't matter if you thought they both sucked. One was affirmatively worse than the other.
It's like when you attended a wedding or some other formal function, back when we still had those. You were probably asked to choose for your entree the beef or some chicken dish with a weird sauce. If you didn't want to go hungry, you chose the beef. Maybe you don't eat beef but you chose it anyway because the chicken always tastes like crap. What you can't do is just write in some other choice, like "Pizza" or "Gary Johnson." This isn't how this works.
CUPP: As a staunch conservative who has voted Republican in past elections, I don't take this lightly. I don't agree with everything that Biden supports, nor am I 100% comfortable with the direction he wants to take the country.
The modern Republican Party is a moral dumpster fire, so Cupp shouldn't try to make voting for Biden some big personal sacrifice. We get that she doesn't agree with everything Biden supports. Neither do I but I'm not voting for Trump or writing in Bebe Neuwirth on my ballot.
(Cupp also refers to herself as both a “staunch conservative" and a “moderate" in the same column. C'mon, Daily News!)
The current president is rolling over for Vladimir Putin and sending federal troops into US cities to beat up mothers. His administration is both racist and incompetent. Jared Kushner says things out loud in meetings and people actually listen. Biden might raise your taxes or maintain the current legal status of abortion but he won't “bungle the worst health crisis of our generation," which Cupp claimed Trump had in May. (It's only gotten worse since then.)
No other issue matters nearly as much as COVID-19. This election, supposed "good" Republicans should vote for the "you can someday go outside again" candidate.
Cupp concedes that Trump is terrible and she's ready to move on ... but ... yes, there's a “but." It's important that Biden choose a running mate who makes her comfortable. I thought this whole damn Democratic primary was about choosing a candidate who made voters like Cupp comfortable. Biden was the safe, fluffy pillow middle America would curl up with on Election Day and when we all woke up, there'd be no more fascism.
CUPP: There is, for example, a massive difference between Kamala Harris and Susan Rice. For me, it's likely the difference between Biden getting my vote and writing someone else in. Harris would have my vote. Rice would not.
The Big Brain “Jeopardy" Champ and I agree: We'd both prefer Kamala Harris as Biden's running mate. However, we're not voting for Harris or Rice. We're voting for Biden — or more pressingly, we're voting to remove the thing squatting in the White House. I'd love to vote for Harris eventually. But that's not this election.
CUPP: Not only do I need to know who Biden will pick, I need to know why. I need to know what he or she envisions for the country. His vice president will not just be a Biden rubber stamp, but a guiding force in his administration, and potentially his replacement. It won't be enough to hear a boilerplate stump speech from his running mate. I need details.
Be cool, lady. I think you'll get details. It's not like when Trump put his unelected idiot son-in-law in charge of everything. Whoever Biden picks will give an interview or two. There'll even be a Zoom debate with Pence.
Cupp has a lot of demands for Biden despite not actually saying why she won't vote for a Biden/Rice ticket. I think that might've been important.
CUPP: I'm hoping, for the sake of the country, he chooses someone I can support.
Because this election will be decided by a single vote in a state on the Acela corridor.
Jimmy Carter said “malaise" and we wound up with “Reagan Democrats." Trump has ruined the nation, and Cupp is still struggling with becoming a “Biden Republican."
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Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He's on the board of the Portland Playhouse theater and writes for the immersive theater Cafe Nordo in Seattle. Tickets are on sale now for his latest Nordo collaboration, "Curiouser and Curiouser," an adaptation of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" and "Through the Looking Glass." It promises to feel like an actual evening with SER (for good or for ill).