Bill Barr Said A Cussy!
Droopy™ Copyright 1950, MGM Productions (Video screenshot)

Somebody send a criminal referral to the #BeBest Justice Department of No Cussing, because Attorney General Bill Barr is mad enough to say a cuss!

Specifically, he said the "BS" word, while whining about how all these mean people think he's an el cheapo Big Lots regional theater understudy transmogrification of the Roy Cohn figure Donald Trump really wants, as he traipses around the globe trying (and failing) to get people to make up conspiracy theories about the origins of the Russia investigation in service of his braindead master.

Barr said the verified cuss in a New York magazine profile of himself:

"That's all bullshit," Barr said to me in his office of the skepticism surrounding his overseas meetings, which he said were necessary under the circumstances. "This is a case where we're asking for assistance and information, some of which is sensitive or classified information."


Hey you guys this is Bill Barr:


Hey you guys this is Bill Barr:


Hey you guys this is Bill Barr:


The rest of the profile can be summarized thusly:

Bill Barr is so mad people don't think presidents should have the powers of kings THAT'S ALL BULLSHIT! and everything just went downhill after Watergate with Congress thinking it's a quote-unquote "equal branch of government" THAT'S ALL BULLSHIT! and Bill Barr doesn't like how the resistance to Trump calls itself the "resistance" because that "connotes that the government is not legitimate" THAT'S ALL BULLSHIT! and Bill Barr doesn't like the idea that the Justice Department has to be "independent" of the president THAT'S ALL BULLSHIT! and Bill Barr likes to play the bagpipes THAT'S NOT NECESSARILY BULLSHIT! and while it's true that Bill Barr and Robert Mueller have always been friends Bill Barr has always been the "alpha" and he used to make fun of Mueller in meetings when they were younger THAT'S SOME BULLSHIT! and anyway you wanna really know what really made Bill Barr say THAT'S ALL BULLSHIT?


According to an anonymous British official recently quoted in the Independent, Barr's inquiries have been "like nothing we have come across before, they are basically asking, in quite robust terms, for help in doing a hatchet job on their own intelligence services."


Anyway, Bill Barr totally thinks Justice Department Inspector General Michael Horowitz is wrong for determining that the Trump-Russia investigation wasn't a Deep State witch hunt THAT'S ALL BULLSHIT! and Bill Barr really doesn't like Rudy Giuliani HE'S A REAL BULLSHIT! but Bill Barr wrote in 2018 that it is totally cool for a president to ask the attorney general to finger-bang "his thumb on the scale in favor of lenity," i.e. ask the AG to maybe look the other way when, for example, the president's lawyer Rudy Giuliani is committing crimes right in front of the whole world ISN'T THAT SOME BULLSHIT! but Bill Barr promises Trump doesn't tell him what to do LOL BULLSHIT! and if you want to read the rest of the profile then you should READ THAT BULLSHIT!

We are bored now, TGIF.

In other cussing news, Adam Schiff said in a New Yorker profile that Trump doesn't give a shit what happens to America, agreeing with what Ukraine embassy diplomat David Holmes testified EU Ambassador Gordon Sondland told him about Trump not giving a shit about Ukraine, aside from what Ukraine can do for him personally:

"That says it all," Schiff told me. "The President doesn't give a shit about what's good for our country, what's good for Ukraine. It's all about what's in it for him personally and for his reëlection campaign." In that small moment in an obscure diplomat's testimony, Schiff reflected, was the impeachment case in all its brazen simplicity. "That is a perfect summary," he said, "of this whole scheme."


This has been a blog post about illegal cussing.

[New York mag / The New Yorker]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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