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Bill Shine is that particular wealthy, laughing, super white, arrogantly sneering asshole who was once a wealthy, super white, arrogantly sneering asshole who worked for Fox News. He had a cushy job as their actual Co-President with that creepy ass Roger Ailes, the guy who looked like patient zero from our next pandemic. Apparently Bill Shine really sucked ass at that job, so is it any wonder that Trump hired him to be his 107th communications director? Rhetorical question, kids, we all know that Trump has one purpose only: to fuck America the fuck up by hiring shitty ass people because of that time WE ALL LAUGHED AT HIM when Obama made a few jokes. Seriously.

Maybe Bill Shine was terrible at his Fox job. Maybe he covered up a "few" sexual harassment claims. Maybe he got shitcanned from Fox because he was shitty at his job. Maybe, just maybe, he shouldn't be working for America. We do not see why he deserves ANY dollars for helping rapey men at Fox get away with all of the raping, but he will be getting millions of dollars from Fox News nonetheless -- and WHILE he works at the White House. Gee, is that bad?


From The Daily Beast:

White House communications chief Bill Shine received an $8.4 million severance package upon leaving Fox News in May 2017 and will continue to be paid by the network for two more years, according to The Hollywood Reporter. Financial disclosure forms cited by the Reporter also showed that Shine is due to receive a bonus and options valued at about $3.5 million both this year and next year from 21st Century Fox.

Shine will be getting paychecks from the media and the government at the same time, which is weird, since we used to actually give a shit about there being a separation between media and government. Even the New York Times used to sometimes care about that.

From the Hollywood Reporter:

Shine signed his financial disclosure form on Oct. 9, after receiving a 68-day extension. According to a background briefing given at the White House in the spring of 2017, new hires have 30 days to complete the financial disclosure form, though they are entitled to two 45-day extensions.

Given the history of Shine, and how the White House doesn't actually give a shit about protocol or paperwork, is it any wonder that Shine took FOREVER to submit his financial disclosure forms? Yes, INDEED, it took him months and months, because lol, who the fuck is going to do a DAMN THING about it? If you said any version of "Maybe the GOP will…" slap yourself very hard in the face right now. Okay, now do it one more time. Never ever think a thing like that again!! Ideas like that lead to mealy-mouthed bothsidesism, and unjustified declarations that today is the day Trump becomes president.

Washington Post:

Trump has had nice things to say about Roger Ailes, the late Fox News chief whose serial sexual harassment Shine is accused in lawsuits of having enabled, and about cable-news star Bill O'Reilly, who paid big settlements to sexual harassment accusers before being driven from Fox News himself. Shine, a top executive, was ousted — though it was called a resignation — in mid-2017.

Gee, we wonder which of his many qualifications drew Shine to Trump?

[DailyBeast / HollywoodReporter / Independent / NYT]

You CAN follow Queen Bianca Bravenak Wonderbitch the Bad Witch on Twitter @BravenakBlog, but you shouldn't because 77% of her tweets are pure garbage. You should DEFINITELY though give us money, right there below!

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Wonderbitch

Wonderbitch aka Bravenak aka Bianca DeLaRosa, loves her jobs as Social Media Manager for Wonkette more than Sarah Huckabee Sanders loves lying to America. Bianca also moonlights as a Witch (THE BAD KIND!!) and is a Freelance Goddess of All Things Ever. Be very nice her because she likes to curse people, especially mean people. You can find Bianca on Twitter @biancadelarosa8 or email her at bianca@wonkette.com

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CLEAR YOUR CALENDARS FOR FEBRUARY 7! And then fill them back up with whatever the fuck you want, because Michael Cohen has announced through his lawyers that he is too scared to testify before an open session of Congress that day, citing threats to his family from Donald Trump and Rudy Giuliani.

Wonkette has no reason to believe Cohen isn't being serious here, and NBC News reports Cohen's wife and father-in-law are particularly concerned about their safety if the man who used to call his boss MIS-TURRRR TWUMP goes to Congress and tells the truth this time. Still, we must pause to note that this is the same guy who said this to NPR reporter Tim Mak, back when Mak was at The Daily Beast:

"I will make sure that you and I meet one day while we're in the courthouse. And I will take you for every penny you still don't have," Cohen told Mak [...] "And I will come after your Daily Beast and everybody else that you possibly know."

"So I'm warning you, tread very fucking lightly, because what I'm going to do to you is going to be fucking disgusting. You understand me?"

It's not so fun when the shoe is on the other foot, IS IT, MICHAEL?

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Did Nancy Pelosi do something to give Donald Trump the mistaken impression he has leverage here? We don't remember her doing anything like that!

Trump sent Pelosi a letter this morning to say that, despite how she told him to stay the fuck out of her House because of his government shutdown, he would still be coming to the House on January 29 to deliver his State of the Union address. And for some weird-ass reason, Trump and his advisers in the White House actually thought she would back down. It's both hilarious and alarming that Trump and his people are that stupid, isn't it?

Anyway, Pelosi took the dare. She took the dare. Was there anybody besides those dumb fucking idiots in the White House who thought she wouldn't take the dare?

Pelosi sent a letter right back to Trump to kindly explain to him that no means "go fuck yourself," and that if he'd like her to stick her foot further up his ass and kick it around a bunch, he's welcome to test her some more:

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