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Senator Sinema, FTW! Maricopa County dropped another batch of votes last night, bringing the Arizona Democrat's lead up to about 32,000. McSally would have to take the remaining uncounted votes by a margin of 22 percent to win at this point. Which means Martha McSally is more likely to melt from someone throwing a bucket of water on her than to take Jeff Flake's seat.

Remember last Wednesday when Trump gave that bonkers presser and bragged about "retiring" Jeff Flake?

Hey, THANKS, DONALD!


We'll wait for the AP to make it official. But if Dave Wasserman is calling it, then the fat lady is singing.

BYE, GIRL! Take your ACA-hating, anti-choice, Planned Parenthood-defunding, pre-existing condition-lying, equal pay-opposing ass back to Tucson. Make sure to give a nice welcome to your successor in AZ-02, Democrat Anne Kirkpatrick. Hey, maybe Arizona Governor Doug Ducey will appoint you to fill out John McCain's old seat if John Kyl decides he can't face another winter in DC. The voters didn't want you, but maybe you'll get to run for the last two years of McCain's term in 2020. Keep telling them that lie about voting to protect pre-existing conditions -- it'll work next time for sure!

Perhaps we're being too hard on Rep. McSally. She hasn't descended into conspiracy loon lies about vote counting, like the rest of her depraved Republican cohort. Maybe because it always takes forever to count the votes in Arizona, so leaving a bunch of sound bites around complaining about it is counterproductive when you're contemplating another run. Maybe McSally actually holds out hope that she can pull off a win. Whatever the reason, golf clap for not shouting a bunch of wild nonsense about cheatin' Dems and summoning up a Russian troll storm to amplify the crazy.

We have no compunction whatsoever about dancing on Dana Rohrabacher's political grave, though. Putin's favorite congressman can fuck right off to a dacha, or join his dirty hacker pal in the Ecuadorean embassy. In fact, we'll have a whole post on that for you in a bit. But while we're in the Golden State, it looks like the Blue Wave is still washing a final few Republicans into the Pacific. The Cow Lover and Mister Sixty-Count Indictment held their seats easily (WTF?!?), but still ...

Luckily, the Republicans have a plan to stem the tide in California.

THAT SHOULD DO IT!

And speaking of bad takes, we'd like to pen a letter to our old selves. The sadder, angrier people who went to bed in the wee hours of Wednesday morning wondering what the fuck was wrong with America. The people who were so gutted when the Florida and Indiana numbers came in that we just grimaced at the news the Democrats had taken back the House. Those people need to CHILL OUT and learn some damn patience. Because not everyone votes on the first Tuesday following the first Monday in November. Arizona, where 75 percent of votes are cast by mail, is likely to become the norm nationwide, and we may not know the final election results for a week or more. Which means that the Wonkette liveblog might be ummm ... less than definitive. So no more crying in our beer before the results are in!

McCaskill, Donnelly, and Heitkamp lost. But Sinema, Tester and Rosen won, Florida Senate is anybody's guess at this point, we're still alive in Mississippi, and we're closing in on 40 flips in the House.

This was a huge blue wave, and we should celebrate it. Onward Wonkette soldiers!

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Five Dollar Feminist

Your FDF lives in Baltimore under an assumed identity as an upstanding member of the PTA. Shhh, don't tell anyone she makes swears on the internet!

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Once upon a time... about ten years ago, a group of entirely ridiculous men burst onto the scene wearing stupid hats and telling men that wearing stupid hats and telling men that walking up to women in bars and insulting ("negging") them would get them laid. This did not last long, as women also had televisions and computers and were completely aware of these tricks as well, so when some ass came up to us in a bar and said "Hey, nice nails, are they real?" we would laugh and laugh and loudly announce "Oh my god, this guy just tried to neg me! Can you believe that shit? HEY EVERYONE, THIS GUY JUST TRIED TO NEG ME!" and then refer to him as "Mystery" the whole night.

Most of the men who tried that shit only did so a few times before realizing that it wasn't going to work, and thus moved on to other things. Perhaps things that did not involve furry hats and coming off as a huge creep. We may never know, because I would assume that those who tried it are now extremely embarrassed and would never, ever admit to this to us.

Still, there were a few men willing to eat that shit up, as well as some grifters willing to take advantage of that. Said grifters tended to be extremely misogynistic and seemed more like they were teaching men how to be as despised by women as they were than teaching them how to actually be liked by women.

Some of them, like Roosh V, a creepy weirdo who actually does live in his mom's basement, actively encouraged men to rape women who were intoxicated to the point of being obviously unable to consent.

However, even that branch of the PUA tree is wilting away. Many "self-help" style PUA forums like Nextasf and RSDnation are shutting down or have already shut down. In March, Chateau Heartiste, a batshit crazy PUA turned White Nationalist/Alt-Right blog was shut down by Wordpress. This week, rape advocate Roosh V (whom you may recall once called yours truly a "Wonkette typist/clown face, would not bang") announced that he was renouncing his PUA ways and devoting himself to Jesus. He explained to the forum he manages that he would no longer be allowing anyone to discuss premarital "fornication."

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'Baby Geniuses' star Jon Voight took to Twitter early this morning to proclaim his undying love for Donald Trump, probably because there is no one left in his life who will listen to him talk about this, or anything else, in person. In this video rant, Voight encouraged members of the Republican Party, whom he apparently thinks are the only real citizens of the United States, to stand by Donald Trump and "acknowledge the truth" that he is the best President since Abraham Lincoln.


Part ONE:

People of the Republican Party, I know you will agree with me when I say our president has our utmost respect and our love. This job is not easy. For he's battling the left and their absurd words of destruction. I've said this once and I'll say this again. That our nation has been built on the solid ground from our forefathers, and there is a moral code of duty that has been passed on from President Lincoln. I'm here today to acknowledge the truth, and I'm here today to tell you my fellow Americans that our country…

Oh no, not our absurd words of destruction!

Part DEUX:

is stronger, safer, and with more jobs because our President has made his every move correct. Don't be fooled by the political left, because we are the people of this nation that is witnessing triumph. So let us stand with our president. Let us stand up for this truth, that President Trump is the greatest president since President Lincoln.

Does Jon Voight not know there have been... other presidents? Can he name them? Because really, it does not sound like it. Does he also not know that a very big chunk of the Republican Party actually does not care very much for Abraham Lincoln? Namely those defenders of Confederate statues that Trump called "very fine people?" Also, did he intentionally diss their beloved Ronald Reagan?

Who can know? Who can even tell what he is trying to say or why he is trying to say it. He doesn't appear to have tweeted much since 2016, so I'm guessing whoever's job it was to keep him from tanking his career quit. Either that... or after filming the seventh season of Ray Donovan, he found out it's going to be canceled or his character is getting killed off or something and he is now free to be a jackass? I don't know, I haven't watched the show, although my parents are very into it and mad that I haven't watched it. Literally all I know about it is that it has something to do with Boston, because they keep mentioning that to me like it's a selling point.

It seems useless at this point to note that the people who scream their faces off about how bad it is for Hollywood celebs to support liberal causes, and how they should keep their politics to themselves, etc. etc. make a way bigger deal than normal people do whenever a Big Time Hollywood Celebrity like Jon Voight or, uh, Scott Baio, supports their cause. Mostly because they're the only ones who have elected a reality TV star and the star of Bedtime for Bonzo (who by the way, also once practically ruined a perfectly good Bette Davis movie with his bad acting. Which is not to say that Dark Victory is not fantastic and probably the best thing to watch if you want to sob your face off, but he was very bad in it.) to run the country.

But we might as well do that anyway, because it actually never stops being funny.

[Jon Voight Twitter]

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