Bobby Jindal, You Have Failed. Go Home NOW!

This is sort of unfair: It's not like he was credible to start with.

Presidential "candidate" Gov. Bobby Jindal really needs to start thinking about packing it in, instead of spending all his time trying to blame absent fathers for school shootings or whining about persecuted Christians. Turns out Jindal is about as popular outside Louisiana as a big dish of Weasel Étouffée, although we suspect that at least the late great Paul Prudhomme could have at least found a way to make the latter appetizing, as long as he renamed the dish and didn't mention Bobby Jindal.

Here's one data point for you:

Yep, the guy who didn't even make it onstage for the first Democratic debate is getting better money than most of the Republican Kids' Table put together. The Atlantic notes that Jindal's campaign is down to only $260,000 in available funds, which is barely enough to cover the fuel cost of flying Donald Trump's ego to Iowa.

Also, nobody cares about Bobby. People may hate Trump, but Jindal? Americans might despise him if they ever thought of him. From the latest NBC-Survey Monkey poll:

Yes, an unnamed "Someone Else" is doing twice as well as Bobby Jindal. Maybe he can take heart from the fact that four candidates -- Jim Gilmore, Rick Santorum, Lindsey Graham, and George Patazzzzzzzzz -- don't even register, so we may not be done with Jindal yet. He's primed for a comeback. Perhaps he can scream at some toddlers for being such irresponsible gun owners or something.

Nah, no more fooling yourself, Bobby: Your party wants Someone Else -- almost anyone else, maybe even Larry Lessig or Jim Webb! -- and the fact that there are four guys Republicans wants even less is no reason to keep polluting the national consciousness with your hideous smarmy sanctimony. Buh bye, Bobby Jindal, you fucking fucker, be sure to let the door hit your unhyphenated ass on the way out.

[The Atlantic / NBC-Survey Monkey Poll]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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