Bonus To Hating Trump: Gross MRA Dude Roosh V Won’t Want To Bang You
This photo of Roosh emerging from his mom's basement will never get old.
There are many reasons to not support Donald Trump. He's a xenophobic, racist, sexist, bigoted blowhard reality star who appeals to the absolute worst elements in this country. He's a liar and a cheat and deals with any problem he faces like a middle school bully. Also, he's Donald Trump.
But did you know that hating Trump can actually improve your sex life? It's true! And not just because Trump supporters have such a hard time getting a date that they have had to set up their own dating site! Also because, if you are a lady, it means that the worst dudes on the internet may soon be voluntarily deporting themselves from your dating pool. Neat!
In a new column up on the hilariously titled "neomasculinist" blog Return of Kings, Roosh V -- a self-proclaimed pick-up artist who literally lives in his mom's basement -- encourages his followers to not have sex with women who do not like Donald Trump. Quite frankly, this is perhaps the first thing I have ever agreed with him on! In fact, I don't think these people should have sex with any woman ever, period. Including women who like Donald Trump! I am not that cruel! I wouldn't want any woman to be the target of a man, or the target of a follower of a man, who thinks it would be neat if rape were legal.
While Donald Trump is far from a perfect Presidential candidate, he represents ideas of beauty, tradition, truth, and nationalism. It’s not surprising that those who hate him and protest at his rallies represent the polar opposite: ugliness, degeneracy, lies, and globalism, though mostly ugliness. The women you see at anti-Trump rallies are awash in obesity, masculine behavior, and utter repulsiveness. For this reason, I recommend that you completely stop having sex with Trump haters.
Works for us!
According to Roosh, "Good women don't hate Trump." He explains this by way of describing his current "girlfriend" who doesn't hate Trump, and is "good."
I’m currently dating a girl who is apathetic about Trump. She doesn’t love him but doesn’t hate him either, and finds him more entertaining than anything. From that, you can correctly guess that she is feminine, thin, and sweet-natured. She doesn’t believe that all men are rapists and need to be taught how not to rape. She doesn’t think that homosexuals should be able to adopt children. From discussions with other masculine men, a pattern has emerged: their women are also not Trump haters.
Said girlfriend, pictured below, is also a model. In Canada.
Though Roosh is currently unavailable (EAT YOUR HEART OUT, LADIES), he says that if he were on the market right now, he would totally make sure all the ladies he spoke to knew of his affinity for Donald Trump right away. Possibly by using one of the following awesome pick-up lines:
“Today I’m actually having a good day because my Donald Trump hat came in.”
“Excuse me, I was on my way to a Trump supporter meeting but you have a happy walk and I wanted to know if you were also going to the same Trump meeting.”
“What do I do? I support Trump. I’m doing some work now to make sure he gets elected this November, because it’s time to make America great again.”
This way, you can safely eliminate any woman too smart to have sex with you by the way she immediately laughs in your face and does not stop laughing until you are at least a block away. Clever!
Of course, Roosh says this isn't just about seduction! It is also because "at this point in our societal decline, it doesn’t make sense to sexually reward a girl who wants to destroy the country with a socialist or globalist candidate."
Yeah, you know what? IT DOES NOT. I will in fact, gladly thank Trump supporters to never, ever attempt to sexually reward me in any way whatsoever. I am totally, 100% good with that. See also, any dude who reads "Return of Kings" for any reason other than to make fun of it. Not just because they have gross opinions, but also because I cannot imagine that the kind of dudes who need to be told they're super special for being white dudes born in America are all that good of a time.
Of course, Roosh being Roosh, he thinks that being deprived of sex with internet trolls is a huge punishment for progressive ladies like myself.
Besides the punitive element of withholding your cock from a Trump hater, we can also look at it from a time-saving perspective. If you are masculine, you simply won’t connect naturally with a feminist who hates Trump. You’ll have to act out her faggy ideal in order to get laid, waste time on interactions that go nowhere, and endure a lot more flaking. You’ll also feel a bit like a sellout for biting your lip when she inevitably spouts anti-male propaganda, which I have in the past.
The only problem is if you live in a liberal urban shithole of brainwashed commie zombies. In that case, you have bigger issues than just getting laid, and should consider moving to a place that is not completely against your belief system. Until then, I urge you to say no to all women who hate Trump. Not only do you reward anti-American behavior, but you make it way easier to meet girls who you genuinely like. Use Donald Trump as a device to make your sex life great again.
OOH! How will they punish us next? By giving us a million dollars, a slice of delicious pie, another season of "Veronica Mars" and also just straight up moving out of the damn country and founding their own Red Pill island? One can only dream!
Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. In addition to her work at Wonkette, she also has a biweekly column at Dame. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse