The free speech martyr Dean Grose, a man condemned for finding watermelonsthe most naturally hilarious garden item of all, will have to resign his mayoralty. Grose rose to national prominence as just the latest of Southern California idiots to circulate some bit of "ha ha, because he's black!" piece of trash and then claim they had no idea they were exploiting racial stereotypes. As of Monday, Grose will resign his position and go to work on a watermelon farm in Hell as part of the president's new spending package. [AP]