BREAKING: Trump's Truth Social Still Raging Tire Fire

Tech
BREAKING: Trump's Truth Social Still Raging Tire Fire

Yesterday Donald Trump's spokesloon Liz Harrington flounced off Twitter in a huff.

"I will soon no longer be posting on Twitter. This is a terrible website that is beyond fixing," she tweeted. "TRUTH will soon be available to everyone when its web application launches.

Surely this will be a body blow for the platform. However will we get along without copypasta of Trump's rambling blog posts augmented by a steady stream of demented vitriol?


But it's probably not a coincidence that Harrington stomped off yesterday with a pointed reference to Truth Social finding a safe space on Al Gore's internet. You can bet she was responding at least in part to a piece from Rolling Stone's Adam Rawnsley and Asawin Suebsaeng on the janky social media's platform's failure to get into the Android app store.

“Is Google trying to fuck me?” Donald Trump wonders aloud to anyone stranded next to him in line at the Mar-a-Lago omelet bar.

Currently Truth Social, his crappy Twitter knock off, is only available on Apple devices. And Arty McDeals, that titan of industry, thinks he knows why.

“He keeps hearing about how Google and YouTube have it out for him … including on Truth Social, and I think he’s taking [it] seriously,” a source told RS.

Devin Nunes, the dairy farming congressman-turned-tech CEO, is apparently happy for his boss to believe there are shenanigans afoot over at Google.

“End of May we will launch PWA (Web Browser) this will allow access from any device,” Nunes "truthed". “After that we will launch an Android App... pending approval from Google!” (Yes, those fakeass tweets are really called "truths." We make a lot of jokes, but that one's 100 percent serious.)

Which is about as likely as my winning the Powerball jackpot, insofar as I have not bought a ticket. Because according to RS those cyber wizards over at Devin's shop haven't even submitted their app to Google for approval. And while it's true that Trump got booted off YouTube at the same time he lost his Twitter handle and Facebook page — i.e. five seconds after he sent an angry mob to overthrow the government — it's not Alphabet CEO Sundar Pichai doing cancel cultures to Truth Social that's keeping the app off Android phones.

RS reports:

Recent Truth Social job postings suggest the Android app is still under development. The company also recently advertised a job for a developer who can assist with “bringing some of our core products to Android,” according to a posting on the TMTG’s website.

Who could have predicted such a shocking turn of events! Oh, right, Reuters, which reported a month ago that the company was hemorrhaging staff, with Josh Adams and Billy Boozer, the chiefs of technology and product development, making a beeline for the exit.

Things are not looking good, but never fear, because Team Truth has a secret weapon in reserve.

Things got bad enough that in recent weeks, the former president’s eldest son, Donald Trump Jr., was called in to take a lead role focused on trying to “fix” what was wrong with the company and the app performance, according to two people familiar with the situation. One of these sources frankly referred to what Trump Jr. was doing as an emergency “rescue mission.” (A spokesman for Trump Jr. declined to comment on this story.)

That's right, they're going to send in DJ to fix it once he finds someone to mop up the meat sweats he presumably gets consuming all Kimberly Guilfoyle's funky steaks. (Allegedly!)

Anyway, none of this is good news for our Devin, who just found out that Elon Musk is going to let Trump back on Twitter if and when he ever manages to buy the company and flush tens of billions of dollars down the toilet. Luckily Trump has said he's done with the blue bird, and we all know he's a man of his word.

Hahahahaha.

Well, good luck, little cowpoke. Surely you wont get put out to pasture in humiliating fashion via tweet after Elon Musk makes you as useless as teats on a bull.

OPEN THREAD!

[Rolling Stone]

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Liz Dye

Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.

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