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Buy Dick Cheney a Burger, Get Your Name on an NSA Watchlist For No Additional Cost

Dick Cheney's android heart is apparently in bad shape. He's had over six thousand heart attacks, and on a recent trip to Europe, his heart attempted to strangle the life from him by forming a blood clot in the Veep's leg.


One blogger has come up with a great way to make the Vice President feel better.

I hereby declare April 13, 2007, is National Buy Dick Cheney a Cheeseburger Day. Millions of Americans will buy cheeseburgers, consume them, and then mail their receipts to Vice President Dick Cheney, to encourage him to chow down or celebrate the fact he can't.

We have a few small quibbles:

* We're clearly not buying Dick a burger, we're just buying ourselves one then rubbing his face in the fact that he can't have one.

* Does anyone seriously think there's a man alive who'd be able to stop Dick Cheney from eating a cheeseburger if he wanted one? We're pretty sure the man eats two cheeseburgers made of the flesh of Guantanamo inmates every damn night!

* Mailing receipts places sounds too damn much like doing taxes, fuck this.

Otherwise, great idea!

National Buy Dick Cheney a Cheeseburger Day

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