Chris Cillizza Probably Shouldn't Invite People To Ask Him Anything
makes more money than you
Chris Cillizza, he is this shitty reporter. He is like Chuck Todd without the dripping sex appeal. He used to work at the Washington Post, where he was well known for "analyzing" the political news of the day, reporting it all with a wide-eyed naïveté that said YES, I TRULY BELIEVE that both sides are equal and valid, and I would NEVER seek to correct absolute bullshit, because that's just not my job as a "journalist." Now he is at CNN, where he does the same exact job. He is particularly awful when it comes to reporting on Hillary Clinton, because there is no sexist, fact-free slur about Hillary he's immune to. (BUT HER EMAILS!) Never one to be bothered to do his own research on a story, he just regurgitates whatever horseshit he sees on the TV ticker, and adds his own loser "analysis" to it. He probably makes more money than you do, which is a crime against meritocracy and good sense.
Click here to read Wonk pal Charlie Pierce 'splaining why Cillizza is such a hack that "When the Smithsonian opens its American Museum of Feckless Journalism, the Cillizza exhibit is going to be right there in the lobby, across from the statues of Maureen Dowd and David Brooks." OUCH. Do you see why we just linked to Charlie Pierce, instead of writing it out our own damn self?
So Chris Cillizza, who is like David Brooks without the dripping sex appeal, decided to do one of those Reddit AMA thingamajiggies, where people who are on Reddit are allowed to "AMA," which stands for "Ask Me Anything." It went very poorly! And he started off so optimistic!
Maybe they would ask him some questions, like they were getting to talk to a Real Journalist! A few people did, but they are dorks, so we'll ignore them. Let's have Ashley Feinberg from Wired set the scene. Do you follow her on Twitter? She is very funny and you should be following her on Twitter.
And he answered!
Hahaha, ok no. He says he is an "analyst." That is incorrect. He says, "I get stuff wrong." That appears to be his job description! He hopes some day he can change Ashley Feinberg's mind. We doubt he will.
That is the most interesting answer Cillizza gave during the whole AMA, so we'll ignore his answers and just show you some more funny questions.
Yes, most of the best questions were just creative versions of, "Can you explain why you suck so hard?" Here are four more:
The next question is badass, because the Redditor actually took the time to go back and find all Cillizza's shittiest headlines (which were at the top of shitty stories) about Hillary Clinton during the campaign. That took some work! Then they finished it off with the best question ever:
Hahahaha, Chris Cillizza is just like H.A. Goodman, without the dripping sex appeal!
A few more, then we're gonna Seacrest Out of this post. In this one, a Redditor wonders what would have happened if Chris Cillizza had been around to cover the actual Hitler:
And in this one, a Redditor wonders if Cillizza were to play Jeopardy! with two other equally stupid people, would they ALL SOMEHOW LOSE? We know we said we weren't including his answers (partially because he didn't answer a lot of the best questions, like a pussy), but this time we are, because oh my god he calls Wolf Blitzer and S.E. Cupp smart and that just tells you everything you ever needed to know about Chris Cillizza:
And finally, somebody wanted to know what Cillizza was like in college:
That's where we end this post.
Chris CLITZILLA did a Reddit AMA and it went very poorly, THE END.
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