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Chuck Schumer Unclear On Difference Between Vandalism And Attempted Murder

Crime

On Monday, someone attempted to murder George Soros by putting a bomb in his mailbox. Also on Monday, someone threw a rock into House Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy's office. Also, I spilled some hot coffee on myself. These are all things that happened on Monday, and were by some measure unpleasant. While most people might say, "Yes, all of those things are unpleasant, but they are not equal degrees of unpleasant," most people are not Chuck Schumer.

In what appears to be an attempt to get someone on Fox News to describe him as a "reasonable guy," Schumer sent out a tweet today lamenting the "despicable acts of violence and harassment" being done by "both sides."



Murder of a window, murder of a person, potato, potahto! Clearly, these are both equally bad things and they must be condemned as such!

All kidding aside, Schumer is playing right into the hands of conservative politicians and pundits (who will never describe him as a reasonable guy, because they hate his guts) by playing up the false equivalencies. The bullshit narrative of "mobs" of evil liberals doing terrible acts of violence to innocent, god-fearing Republicans is being used by conservatives to justify acts like attempting to murder George Soros, and by suggesting that putting a rock through a window is the same as trying to murder someone, Schumer is just being their useful idiot. They want them to be the same thing. They want to be able to act as if someone putting a bomb in someone's mailbox was an act of self-defense rather than an act of terrorism.

Schumer is attempting to be gracious. He thinks he is going to get gracious points for coddling Republicans. He thinks that if he condemns both of these things equally, that Republicans will take this as a sign of good faith and then go and condemn the mailbox bomber. And maybe some of them will, briefly, but only for cover. and then they will go back to telling people that they can blame George Soros for everything that is bad in their lives and scaring the crap out of them about the antifa hiding behind their couch poised to strike at any moment.

If the situation were reversed -- if a liberal put a bomb in Steve Bannon's mailbox and a Republican threw a rock through Nancy Pelosi's window -- would anyone be talking about that damn rock? No, they would not. Not one single person would be going all "both sides" on this, because that would be ridiculous. Democrats would be scrambling to condemn the bomber and Republicans would never let it go and use it every day to make sure their base knew they needed to be straight up terrified of the Left. There would be 85,000 "Will Liberals Be Putting A Bomb In YOUR Mailbox Next??!?" segments on Fox. In this respect, they are smarter than we are.

They are certainly smarter than Chuck Schumer is.

And now you may have an open thread!

[Twitter]

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Robyn Pennacchia

Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Previously, she was a Senior Staff Writer at Death & Taxes, and Assistant Editor at The Frisky (RIP). Currently, she writes for Wonkette, Friendly Atheist, Quartz and other sites. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse

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