Church Of Holy Bleach Drinking Offering $450 Seminars. We Say NO THANK YOU!

Yeah, don't drink bleach. It is a bad idea.

In this increasingly polarized society we live in, it's hard to find any kind of consensus on anything -- but one would think that there would still be a few things here and there that we could all agree upon. One also might assume that one of those things would be "drinking bleach is a bad idea."

But if one were to do that, they would be wrong. Because the Genesis II Church is holding a seminar today in Washington State in order to promote the use of a substance they call "Miracle Mineral Solution," which they consider a miracle cure for every disease on earth, and which the FDA and anyone who can read ingredients would consider "industrial bleach."

The event was promoted on Facebook by organizer Tom Merry, who wrote the following description of the event we are all tragically missing out on:

I am thrilled to help bring effective alternative healing to the Pacific Northwest! Everyone knows someone sent home to die by their doctor because mainstream medicine can't do anything more for them. Bishop Mark Grenon will be leading the seminar and introducing attendees to Chlorine Dioxide Therapy, otherwise known as MMS; sharing the history of the discovery and development of MMS and its protocols by Jim Humble; and giving testimonies of health recovery wonders from around the world that are nothing short of miraculous. Donation for registration is $450 per person; $800 for couples; and $400 for returning seminar students. And includes:
1. Membership Certificates.
2. 1 year membership.
3. Package of Sacraments (MMS, Activator, MMS 2, DMSO, Spray bottle, capsules, etc...)
4. Membership Id card. (Following the Seminar you must email us your photo and we will then make and mail your ID card to you, this is included in the Seminar Donation)
5. Light lunch for Sat. and Sun. Snacks & Coffee break also.
6. Genesis II Church Seminar pamphlet.
7. Link for all the Protocol Videos, PDF of Jims and Mark's ebooks, etc.
8. Free sign up to our Video course online, where you can study all the material and take the exam and become a G2 Church Health Minister. You will have the knowledge to help heal many people of this world's terrible dis-eases. Only now will you need to go and gain the experience. Go forth and heal!!!

Now, $450 may seem like a lot of money now, but I bet it won't seem like any money at all once you are dead from drinking bleach.

The Facebook page also included a link to this terrifying video of MMS people going to Uganda and forcing malaria-stricken babies to drink bleach as they scream out in pain. 0/10 do not recommend watching. It is pretty horrifying.

According to this church and some crazy people on the internet, MMS can be used to cure HIV, autism, diabetes, malaria, cancer, acne, and a variety of other ailments, including Morgellons. Yes! You too can cure yourself of a pretend disease by drinking MIRACLE bleach. What a fabulous blessing. Of course, what they don't tell you is that the reason you will no longer be suffering from these issues is because you will be dead. Because drinking bleach kills you, just like it killed this lady. 

The church helpfully lists the benefits of membership on their site:

1. Protection against vaccinations, unwanted x-rays, scans, or health insurance mandated by human authority. We are a church and it is against our church's beliefs. People have already used their membership cards to keep from being vaccinated, and from going through scans.

2. The ability to purchase health products of all kinds in any quantity including but not limited to food, plants, vitamins minerals, herbs and all remedies in any quantity necessary for yourself or your family. This protection will be more understood when the church has its own health food stores right in the church building. The belief includes the right to maintain these products in your own home.

3. The membership includes a picture membership card with these rights written on the back and a notice that anyone violating these rights will be prosecuted by the Church.

While I certainly hate lines at the airport myself, as an avid watcher of documentaries about Jonestown, I am a tad concerned about the Church of Bleach Drinking And Not Having To Go Through Airport Security. There is a possibility that might not end well!

All kidding aside, this is pretty fucked up and it seems like this guy and anyone else going around telling people that drinking bleach will cure autism should probably be in jail. Wait, no, should definitely be in jail.

Anyway, this is now your open thread. Enjoy, and don't drink any bleach, because that would be bad.

[ The Guardian ]