Congressman From 'Hee Haw' Wishes Democrats Hated Terrorists As Much As Trump Loves Gold Star Families

On Wednesday, senators and congressmen had classified briefings where they learned the very real super-secret intel Donald Trump examined with his brain and thereby decided it was mandatory that he order the killing of Iranian Maj. Gen. Qasem Soleimani. When they came out, those who were honest were appalled -- not by the intelligence, but by the briefing. Democratic Rep. Gerry Connolly called the briefing "sophomoric." Republican Senator Mike Lee said it was the most fucking embarrassing briefing he's seen in the entire time he's been a senator, adding that it was (real quotes!) "lame" and "insane" and that the briefers spent more time telling Congress they "need to be good little boys and girls and not debate this in public" than they did actually, you know, briefing them.

Rep. Doug Collins (R-Hee Haw) presumably attended that briefing too, but when he went to visit North Korean news lady Lou Dobbs on Fox Business last night, that's not what was on his mind. Instead he decided to enter the "Let's call Democrats America-haters/terrorist lovers" contest (currently in first place: Nikki Haley and this guy!) and oh boy, he really stepped in some fresh dogshit:

COLLINS: They're in love with terrorists, we see that, they mourn Soleimani more than they mourn our Gold Star families who suffered under Soleimani.

Really? That's what we're going with? Congressman who spent the impeachment hearings performing his role as a redneck auctioneer who somehow got his mouth super-glued to Donald Trump's ballsack would like to say that Democrats not only are "in love with terrorists," but that they are sad about Soleimani's death "more than they mourn our Gold Star families"?


Is that ... is that exactly where the congressman from Hee Haw wants us to go in our brains right now? To Gold Star Families? Like, perhaps, for instance, Khizr and Ghazala Khan, the parents of deceased American soldier Army Captain Humayun Khan, whom Donald Trump spent the days after the RNC in 2016 beating the shit out of, because they committed the sin of not loving Donald Trump enough? Remember how that controversy started because the Khans spoke out at the DNC (you know, with the terrorist-lovers/Gold-Star-family-haters!) against Trump? Remember how Trump attacked Ghazala Khan, suggesting that maybe she let her husband do all the talking at the DNC because she wasn't allowed to talk, because HINT HINT MUSLIM?

And remember how Trump just whined and whined and whined about it, because of how he is a "counter-puncher"?

Remember in 2017, once Trump was president, when he lied multiple times and said Barack Obama never called Gold Star Families, but Trump did? Remember, later that week, when just to prove a point he called Myeshia Wilson, the widow of Army Sgt. La David Johnson, and proceeded to hurt her feelings on the phone? And Johnson's mother Cowanda Jones-Johnson told the Washington Post that "President Trump did disrespect my son and my daughter and also me and my husband" on that call? And when that news came out, Trump and John Kelly spent a week attacking their congresswoman, Florida Rep. Frederica Wilson, just because she stood up for that particular Gold Star family?

Are those the Gold Star families Doug Collins just wishes Democrats loved as much as they loved Qasem Soleimani?

We are just asking.

We understand if Collins can't answer on account of what we said about his mouth, super glue, and Donald Trump's ballsack.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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