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Craigslist: A Resume Worth the Paper It's Printed On

We worry we may be overqualified:


Tired of the office? Got the blue collar blues? Try Toilet: The Novel

Looking for a professional buisnessman to run throughout downtown D.C., Dupont Circle and Georgetown with a toilet seat on his head, preferably during hot weather. Job entails dressing professionally and handing out toilet paper to interested residents.

Job will pay 35 dollars, or 7 dollars an hour, for one afternoon's worth of work.

To apply, send your cover letter and resume to toiletthenovel@aol.com

For more info on the job visit:

www.toiletthenovel.com

Gonna be a competitive applicant, uhm, pool we thinkg: This town offers no shortage of shitheads.

UPDATE: If you don't get the job, try your luck at the "Toilet Contest":

WIN A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF FIG-NEWTONS, A TRIP TO NEW YORK CITY WITH A FULL WEEK BOOKING IN A RESIDENTIAL SEWER, OR HOTEL SWEET (YOU CHOOSE!), AND YOUR VERY OWN TOILET DUCK! (NOT THE CLEANING PRODUCT FOLKS. BUT, A REAL LIVE DUCK THAT WILL LIVE IN YOUR TOILET! IT WILL EVEN QUACK WHEN YOU SHIT ON IT!*)
We expect to an ad to fill the duck's job on Craigslist soon

Tired of the office? Got the blue collar blues? Try Toilet: The Novel [Craigslist]

Toiletthenovel

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It started with them damn hats. (Image: Wikimedia Commons)

A guest post by "Knitsy McPurlson," which we suspect is not a real name.

Yr Wonkette is not the only website run by brilliant peoples unafraid to poke people with sharp, pointy sticks. Ravelry.com – a website for knitters, crocheters, and other folks interested in textiles and fiber arts – is poking people with knitting needles, which are very sharp indeed.

This past weekend, Ravelry.com's founders showed the world how easy it is to de-platform white nationalists and racists when they banned all "support of Donald Trump and his administration" from their website, concluding they "cannot provide a space that is inclusive of all and also allow support for open white supremacy." Seems like people smart enough to decode a knitting pattern are also smart enough to decode Trump's not-so-hidden message of racism and white nationalism.

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One day, God willing, my grandchildren will click open their history textbooks and read about the Central American migrant internment camps. They'll learn about sick kids, locked in cages, kept hungry and dirty and cold for weeks on end, and they'll be horrified.

"Bubbie," they'll say, "how could this happen in America? How could there be toddlers sleeping on the ground without blankets, without soap or toothbrushes to clean themselves?"

"I don't know. I wish I had done more. I'm ashamed," I'll say. We will all have to answer for this atrocity. But some of us will have to answer more than others. Not just the archvillains like Stephen Miller and John Kelly, but the people who kept right on doing their jobs, even as those jobs morphed into defending concentration camps.

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