David Perdue Would Also Too Like Some Election Cops For Georgia


Loser former GOP senator David Perdue is just hellbent on beclowning himself as much as possible in his effort to primary Georgia GOP Governor Brian Kemp, as punishment for Kemp's insufficient and inconsistent tongue-bathing of Donald Trump's armpits. Are Georgians clamoring for Perdue? Haha no. We cannot think of one person in the state of Georgia who is clamoring for this old crusty idiot who lost his Senate race to the dashing Jon Ossoff.

Of course, this is mostly about Trump's Big Lie, and because Perdue isn't necessarily known for having original thoughts, he's copy/pasting the thing Florida GOP Gov. Ron DeSantis announced in his state of the state speech last week, about his desire to create an election police force of election cops, to cop feels all over elections:

Oh for fucks sake.

Let's see what Perdue has to say.

"What happened in 2020 should never happen again," Perdue said on Thursday morning as he announced his proposal to create a law enforcement unit that would investigate election crimes and fraud in Georgia and would have the authority to make arrests.

Nothing happened in 2020, you limp dildo. Joe Biden goddamn won Georgia, Raphael Warnock beat Kelly Loeffler, and Jon Ossoff beat your ass.

Or as Fox News explains more politely in its article:

Georgia was one of a half dozen states where now President Biden narrowly edged former President Donald Trump to win the White House in the 2020 election.

Yes. Fox News even helpfully reminds us that Georgia counted its votes three times. But Brian Kemp and Georgia GOP Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger flat refused to find imaginary votes in their assholes for Donald Trump and commit some real election-stealing crimes to preserve white Republican power in Georgia, and that is what Perdue is REALLY performatively mad about right now.

"When Georgians had legitimate questions about the November election, Kemp refused to investigate or fix problems before the January runoff.," Perdue charged in a statement to Fox News. "Leave it to a 20-year career politician like Kemp to sit on his hands when we needed him most. He failed us, and Georgians lost confidence that their vote would count."

Fuck off.

Georgians didn't have "legitimate questions." Donald Trump and sniveling sycophantic charlatans like David Perdue helped fill their heads with malarkey stories about imaginary voter fraud, which led to them having questions based on what they had heard from men they trusted, i.e. Trump and sniveling sycophantic charlatans. There was no organic process here. The "legitimate questions" of white Georgia Republicans were literally force-fed into their mouths.

Perdue's not done pulling his pud about this:

Perdue emphasized that "the purpose of this law enforcement unit is to give Georgians confidence that only legal votes will be counted, and that anyone who tries to interfere with our elections will be arrested and prosecuted."

And he described his call for elections to be independently audited before they are certified as "a commonsense step to safeguard our election integrity and ensure transparency and accountability in our system. When I'm Governor, we'll have the safest and securest elections in the country."


This has of course caused yelling from Brian Kemp's camp, which is saying Perdue is a liar (they call him that a lot) and bragging about its own efforts to fuck the vote, with his spokesman saying that "while Perdue was golfing for the last year, Governor Kemp was fighting the woke mob to champion the strongest election integrity law in the nation."

Good God, may they fight and fight and fight.

Go give Stacey Abrams some money while they're fighting.

[Fox News]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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