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R. Kelly Definitely DID NOT Call In Fake Death Threats To Film Screening About R. Kelly's Sex Crimes. NOPE.

sex crimes

Remember that time the Lying Devil cancelled R. Kelly, but he was too late, because we had already cancelled him a million times? Now he's cancelled a KABILLION times. We don't know when his predatory fuckery against women and young girls began, all we know is that it better have fucking ended, or we might just lose our cool. Is it time for "Lorena Bobbitt's Dick Cutting Academy and Finishing School for Young Ladies" to start a scholarship program, not that Wonkette would ever support such a thing? Or can we just have Mr. Kelly behind bars where he belongs for a while?

Sure, Mr. 12 Play isn't suspected of being the culprit behind the evacuation of the screening of a Lifetime docu-series entitled Surviving R. Kelly, but it's obvious that the threats were made by someone supportive of him. The toxic culture he surrounds himself with bleeds into everything he comes in contact with, like a cloying stench that lingers in the air and refuses to dissipate.


From Vox:

A private New York City screening of Lifetime's upcoming docuseries Surviving R. Kelly was evacuated and then canceled on Tuesday night after two anonymous callers phoned in threats, including a gun threat.

Jinkies! What a very mysterious mystery! Kelly is accused of holding women as quasi-sex slaves in a bizarre Stockholm syndrome-infused harem, or something like that. Who in the world would try to stop people from hearing the stories of his many victims? We are NOT saying it was Kelly, but how do we know it WASN'T Kelly? We don't. So we can wildly speculate while also not letting this distract us from his ALLEGED (Really? Still alleged? Sigh, fine.) sex crimes against women and teen girls.

The series is the second of two documentaries produced this year that have examined the longstanding allegations of sexual abuse brought by multiple women against the singer.

We have been knowing about his ass for years, and many of us can't even bring ourselves to listen to "Your Body's Calling" without wondering how old that body was and if it was against her will. Better to just not listen.

Managers at NeueHouse Madison Square, the venue where the premiere was being held, told press that they did not believe the threats were credible. But they and Lifetime still decided to evacuate the building in response, as a precaution.
"The safety and security of our panel, guests and staff is of paramount importance to Lifetime," the network said in a statement. Police were also called to the scene.

Well, it's good that the police don't believe the threat was credible, but in this day and age with constant shooting and murders of innocent women being as commonplace as an Uber, we have to be careful as fuck.

The threats were generally believed to have been phoned in by R. Kelly supporters who wanted to intimidate the production and the women who have accused Kelly. One anonymous source told Variety the threats were "painful for the survivors."

Quick question. Who the fuck stans for Kelly so hard that they are willing to terrify innocent women just to spare him the indignity of having this work viewed by the victims? It's not like they can stop Lifetime from releasing it since they OWN A FUCKING NETWORK. Maybe instead of trying to cover up the crime so very stupidly and awkwardly, they should hold an intervention and get Kelly's predatory ass in a safe place. A place where women are safe from him FOREVER.

"Calling in a noncredible threat to the NYPD to interrupt our screening IS an act of desperation from people who don't want these truths shared with the world," the film's executive producer, Dream Hampton, told CNN.

Damn straight. Pretty sure it's illegal too, and won't it be a blessing if the NYPD somehow has technology that can trace calls and help them locate the asshole who called that shit in?

Several attendees, including Me Too movement founder Tarana Burke, tweeted about the evacuation using the hashtag #MuteRKelly, which has become a form of protest attempting to diminish Kelly's clout within the music industry and on streaming sites like Spotify.

OMG. Are y'all STILL buying his music? Yo, stop that shit right now. This is why it's impossible to hold assholes like him accountable. Too many people continue to fund him and prop his tired ass up, when what really he needs is a reckoning, or perhaps to actually do some time in jail. Even his ex-wife sides with the women, so it's pretty clear he is problematic as fuck on his own. No Devil jumped inside of him and turned him out. He did that to himself. Stop buying his fucking music or you're complicit. It's not okay.

[Telegraph / Vox / NYDN]

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Wonderbitch

Wonderbitch aka Bravenak aka Bianca DeLaRosa, loves her jobs as Social Media Manager for Wonkette more than Sarah Huckabee Sanders loves lying to America. Bianca also moonlights as a Witch (THE BAD KIND!!) and is a Freelance Goddess of All Things Ever. Be very nice her because she likes to curse people, especially mean people. You can find Bianca on Twitter @biancadelarosa8 or email her at bianca@wonkette.com

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Photo by Wonkette Operative 'Teecha'

If it's Sunday, this must be Nice Things, our weekly escape from the quotidian awfulness. Our featured doggo this week comes via a photo by Wonkette reader "Teecha," and we don't think Teecha mentioned a name for this lovely old rescue dog. If it is a dog at all: I think it may actually be one of Sia's more inventive disguises, like that time she was a little pony.

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The producers of your favorite live-action Jack Chick pamphlet, "God's Not Dead" -- you know, the one where the Hercules dude plays an evil philosophy professor who tells all of his students on the first day that they are no longer allowed to believe in god? As all secular professors do? -- have come out with a thrilling new movie, all about how abortion is bad or whatever.

The movie tells the "true" story of Abby Johnson, a former Planned Parenthood clinic worker turned professional anti-choicer. Johnson has been a darling of the forced birth circuit ever since she made up ridiculous and provably false reasons for quitting the Planned Parenthood that was about to fire her for being bad at her job.

Basically, she claims that Planned Parenthood was pushing her to make more abortions happen so they could reel in more dough, and also that she witnessed (for the first time ever!) an ultrasound-guided abortion and saw the baby move from the light and then immediately realized that what she was doing was wrong.

The thing is, however -- no ultrasound-guided abortions were performed on the day she said it happened, and the only reason there was an uptick in abortions at her clinic was because they started offering the abortion pill on a daily basis (and had previously only been performing surgical abortions every other Saturday).

As you may have guessed, the movie does not address any of these things. It also looks very, very bad.

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