Deleted Comments: Obama Murdered Scalia, Just Like He Killed Joan Rivers!

Oh, so THAT'S what that gesture means!
[contextly_sidebar id="DfSgOPQIgXf4nCFwHYCRsWSyVPD6plRw"]Hey Kids, welcome to a special Saturday edition of your weekly Deleted Comments, seeing as our how Sunday morning is going to be consumed with giving you good people all the straight dope on the Nevada caucuses and the South Carolina primaries. So we're scrambling up the order a little -- we're pretty sure you can handle it, because you are smart and open-minded. But not open-minded enough to see the plain reality in front of you: Namely, how Barack Obama personally ordered a hit on Antonin Scalia in the last year of his term, because that's just the sneaky kind of monster he is. Not surprisingly, we received a number of comments from folks who simply could not believe we could ever be so naïve as to think a 79-year-old man might die of natural causes. Typical of the genre was "steve083672r7," who simply wanted us to use our own common sense instead of believing everything the Controlled Media feed us:
What a piece of shit article.How do you know he wasn't murdered by someone? Pillow over face. Bed completely unwrinkled. No autopsy.
I'm not a "conspiracy theorist" whatsoever, but something is fishy about this.
Yeppers. "I'm not a conspiracy theorist..." is pretty much the same dead giveaway as "I'm not a racist, but..."
We also heard from "McWayne," whose comment history is fun -- he mostly posts about logos and typography, but this Scalia business has him hopping mad, since it helps us get a glimpse of the shadowy reality just beyond the veil of what we think is real:
Far greater wingnuts believe people in power don't conspire to keep and increase it. History is a ledger of 1 conspiracy after another. Wake the fuck up.
It's all in the kerning, we suppose.
We were slightly more impressed by "ipmala," who not only misspells the name of our beloved old '73 Chevy (Vlad the Impala), but whose comment history is truly a beautiful trove of wingnuttery. On Wonkette, he left only a bog-standard pile of derp:
Obama....the Mother F**ker....had Scalia KILLED. The next one Obama will go after is Justice Clarence Thomas...the last Conservative on the Court. Mother f**ker Obama wants to load the Supreme Court with Liberal judges....before he leaves office.
Oh, but over at Alex Jones's Clearinghouse For Alternative Realities, he left a truly beautiful comment, a sample of such pure unhinged whackadoody that we hereby adopt it as our own:
Obama had Scalia KILLED....just like he had Joan Rivers KILLED. He wants to fill the Supreme Court vacancy with another Liberal justice....before he leaves office. The CIA can administer a substance (either orally...or injected) which will induce a HEART ATTACK. The same way that Andrew Breitbart was KILLED....by Obama. Worst part is......the pussy Republican Party will probably allow Obama to fill the vacancy with anyone he wants --> Mitch McConnell is totally owned by Obama. Alex Jones is right....the next one to die of a will be Clarence Thomas.
Joan Rivers?! We should also point out that of the many follow-ups to the comment, the only skeptical comments were about the timing of Scalia's death -- a few supporters popped in to say that Obama had also clearly murdered Breitbart and Michael Hastings. But not a word about Barack Obama's assassination of JOAN FOR CHRISSAKE RIVERS. You'd think there'd have been more of a fuss about that.
But then we thought to Google it, and all was clear: Of course Barry Bamz murdered Joan Rivers, because she had joked about him being gay and Michelle Obama being a tranny. One more truth-teller, silenced by the Illuminati.
We really don't keep up with the REAL news, is what we're ashamed to admit.
[contextly_sidebar id="vgcF3gHCE1yg06kiDyKMcl3Xsbwbo5YY"]Another piece, on how Scalia's untimely death has probably ruined North Carolina's gerrymandering scheme to disenfranchise blacks, put Deep Thinker "jimmyshirleyjr" in a contemplative mood, so he offered us a quick review of American History, as taught by Stormfront:
One thing is a given fact. History proves it.So long as Whites were in control of this country, the future always appeared bright, for everyone. One can not deny all minority races in 1940 were better off than they had been in 1840.
Ever since the ascension of the Blacks into the mainstream life in the States, quality of damn near everything has been sacrificed just for the sake of them, in the name of the marxist/communist philosophy of "diversity, tolerance, etc."
Robyn Ryan, 3 hours ago, mentioned "Competent public education could have prevented this" Whatever else he/she meant, one thing is for sure. Ever since the public schools were desegregated in the mid 60's on, high standards by which all White students had to achieve have been gradually dumbed down so the Black kids can get an 'A' on their report cards.
You go to lots of places, not all mind you, where Blacks are employed and interact with the public and one cant help but notice how inferior the service is.
Regarding the Academy Awards in movies. In the stead of trying to do better, trying harder to get nominated next year, the Blacks whined like a sullen little toddler who didnt get its way and demanded the Academy dumb down just so they can get nominated. History being a predictor, if there is not a wholesale sweep next year of only Black nominees and Black winners in the major categories, the Blacks will be Fergusoning all over the place.
Bunch of crybabies.
How did the Academy Awards get tossed into a post that was at least nominally about Antonin Scalia and racial gerrymandering? Obviously, You People are simply too distracted by the lamestream media's bread and circuses to pay attention to what's really going on in this country, you fools! Everything was better in the 1940s! Especially the polio -- that was so awesome.
And finally, to help wash the taint of undistilled racism out of your mouth, the same piece elicited a plea for journalistic integrity from one "Ronnie Lee," who offers a fascinating new standard by which journalism should be judged:
No one that has commented on this article actually knew Scalia you are all only speaking what you have been told and online ,true facts have away of being altered.
We would note that Ronnie Lee doesn't claim to have known Antonin Scalia either, but it's a pretty good rule: Unless you've personally met someone, you're incompetent to write about that person. Please join us tomorrow for a fascinating wrap-up of the Nevada caucuses and South Carolina primaries, in which we'll tell you all about what the cashier at Albertson's told us when we bought beer.
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.