Details You Didn't Know About Bret Michaels! Tabs, Fri., March 26, 2021

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Tabs gifs by your friend Martini Ambassador!

"After weeks of whining, the White House press corps got its first official Biden presidential news conference on Thursday." Give them the sharp side of your tongue, Jennifer Rubin. Oh both sides are sharp? Even better. (Washington Post)

Oh. Police arrested a Black state representative for knocking on Gov. Brian Kemp's office door while he signed the bill criminalizing giving water to people in line to vote, among every other vote suppression tactic they could think of. Oh. — Atlanta Journal Constitution

The bill he signed, she is bad. (Mother Jones)

Jason Miller is filth, lying to the court that he got fired so he wouldn't have to pay child support edition. — Guardian

Blackmail-raper Eric Greitens is filth, and now he's blaming the Left and running for Senate, upside down smile emoji! — Erin Gloria Ryan at Daily Beast

How many extra people did Trump shoot in the middle of Fifth Avenue? Oh a couple. (Reuters)


Tucker Carlson says they wouldn't be fascist if we didn't make them be fascist. — Media Matters

Okay, but you guys, this is hilarious. He's making all these Republican candidates fly down and do Apprentice seshes with him on why they should get his endorsement (this particular story is about all the Ohio Senate losers, wanking motion) and they're so pathetic while they lick his fat ass and brag about how they're "crushing" each other, and I am not sorry at all. (Politico)

Roger Stone's Oath Keeper bodyguards practicing headshots to "stop Antifa," they do not seem nice. — Mother Jones

Uh oh, Sesame Street talking about race again, prepare for incoming shitstorm. (CNN)

Should Justice Breyer retire? In fact, yeah! For reasons! As explained by Joan Walsh! — The Nation

The Supreme Court made it easier to sue corporations and also police for excessive force. Does Gorsuch know? (NBC News)

Holy yikes, this longread about the author who has spent all her worldly goods and health trying to break a (wrongfully?) convicted murderer out of "Pleasant Valley." (Pleasant Valley State Prison is in Coalinga, home of Cowschwitz, nothing pleasant about it.) — New York mag

Except I just learned that Temple Grandin herself said Harris Ranch isn't Cowschwitz, so ... I take it back, yay? (Wik!)

The top 5 jobs where your boss is most likely to be a psychopath! (It is "all jobs.") — The Ladders

Everything you need to know about Blocky McBlockedface! (Middle East Eye)

Alan Turing is on the new 50! Pounds, not dollars, and I do not know how to make a pounds sign. Can I use a hashtag? ALSO, Trump's gone, when the hell do we get our Tubmans? — Bank of England

Artichoke lemon (with asparagus too!) sauce for pasta, because Trader Joe's doesn't put it in jars anymore, I asked. (Taste of Home)

Liz informs me Passover is tomorrow (today tomorrow, Saturday!) so here are your 23 Passover Recipes That Are Different This Year From All Other Years Because Who the Fuck Makes "Caprese Zoodles" and Coconut Salmon for Passover Apparently It Is Delish!

Fuck it, here's a rib roast. (Tin Eats)

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