Do We Finally Have Enough To Make A Negligent Homicide Charge Against Jared Kushner Stick?
Jared Kushner is the dumbest man who ever walked the Earth without stumbling into the mouth of a sleeping saber-toothed tiger. He might think he's smarter than all the Black people who've avoided marrying Ivanka Trump, but he's not. Unfortunately, his idiocy was a driving force in the Trump administration's disastrous COVID-19 response.
CNN reports that Donald Trump's useless son-in-law bragged to Bob Woodward in mid-April about how the president had “cut out the doctors and scientists" advising him on the pandemic. He told Woodward in a taped interview that Trump was “getting the country back from the doctors," and he referred to this process as “a negotiated settlement," because he's an asshole.
KUSHNER: There were three phases. There's the panic phase, the pain phase, and then the comeback phase.
Fuck you. We're talking about the coronavirus not Robert Downey Jr.'s career. This doesn't end with Iron Man.
KUSHNER: I do believe that last night symbolized kind of the beginning of the comeback phase.
Jerkoff Jared here was referring to that fateful day in April when Trump announced he was bored with the coronavirus and governors should just open their states up already. There was no plan and sure as hell nothing resembling the robust national testing strategy that could make this not a dumpster fire.
No, this wasn't the beginning of a “comeback phase" for America. It was more of a comeback for the coronavirus, but like Ms. Aretha Franklin, it had never gone away, girl.
KUSHNER: That doesn't mean there's not still a lot of pain and there won't be pain for a while, but that basically was, we've now put out rules to get back to work.
More than 40,000 Americans had died by this point, but Kushner won't quit with the MBA-speak, like a corporate consultant saying there'd be some "pain points" during the right-sizing. There was indeed “pain for a while," as almost 200,000 more Americans have died since April. That's more than 60 9/11s.
Trump is such a sociopath he couldn't stick to his own piddly-ass rules for reopening. It wasn't long before Trump was cheering on states such as Georgia, Texas, and Florida that opened well before they were ready. Currently, all three states are moving into the hot zone.
KUSHNER: Trump's now back in charge. It's not the doctors.
Yeah, this line is like the Bat-Signal for the guys at the Lincoln Project. The ads make themselves.
We needed a president whose ego wasn't so fragile he wouldn't mind doctors taking the lead during a public health crisis. Trump wants to avoid responsibility for all the needless COVID-19 deaths that occurred on his watch, but Kushner said it loud and clear: “Trump's now back in charge."
And what do we have to show for it a week before the election? Trump and Kushner prioritized the economy over human life. This plan was evil but also stupid. The economy could never recover fully nor could Americans safely resume a normal life until the virus was contained.
Jor-El Anthony Fauci sounded this alarm in May when the idiots running the White House were trying to marginalize him.
DR: FAUCI: There is a real risk that you will trigger an outbreak you may not be able to control, which, in fact, heterodoxically would set you back, not only leading to some suffering and death that could be avoided but could even set you back on the road to try to get economic recovery. It would almost turn the clock back instead of going forward.
Kushner, who's totally lacking in self-awareness, told Woodward that “the most dangerous people around the president are over-confident idiots," but fortunately Trump had replaced them all with "more thoughtful people who kind of know their place."
While these obsequious sycophants politely stood by and watched, Trump and Kushner personally ushered in a coronapocalypse. The question now isn't whether they should walk out of the White House permanently on January 20, 2021, but whether they should do so in chains.
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Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He's on the board of the Portland Playhouse theater and writes for the immersive theater Cafe Nordo in Seattle. Tickets are on sale now for his latest Nordo collaboration, "Curiouser and Curiouser," an adaptation of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" and "Through the Looking Glass." It promises to feel like an actual evening with SER (for good or for ill).