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Fox Two-Timing With Bernie Sanders And Donald Trump Is PISSED

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Donald Trump isn't happy that Fox News hosted a town hall for Bernie Sanders and let him leave with all his limbs. He whined about it on Twitter for most of Tuesday. First, there was the general question of why Sanders was even on the friendly state media outlet that tells him what bills to sign.

President Surfer Dude thinks it's, like, sooo weird that Sanders would try to reach the cranky old white people demo. He suggests that Bret Baier assembled an "audience" (no, we don't know either) of shiny, happy Stepford residents. He ignores co-moderator Martha MacCallum and ends with a non-sequitur dig at former DNC chair Donna Brazile. Trump's always boasting about the record low black unemployment rate, so he really shouldn't begrudge the sister having a job, even if it is on Fox.


Trump thought the "audience" was too "smiley and nice." Where were all the unhinged assholes from one of his rallies?

There is zero evidence of anything the president of the United States claims in this message he shared with millions. We should never become too inured to the notion that the chief executive spreads random conspiracy theories like your scrambled-egg-brained grandpa.

The Sanders town hall was held in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, which Barack Obama won twice before Trump carried it in 2016. Trump apparently believed that very act transformed the area into a paradise with chocolate fountains and plenty of jobs in the new hover car factories. This is presumably why he praises himself in the third person like any perfectly stable wannabe dictator.

MacCallum insisted that the audience was fair and balanced, which probably annoyed Trump even more because he wanted a crowd of commie haters equipped with rotten tomatoes and pitchforks. Fox really let him down. CNN, after all, apologized for stacking Sanders's town hall in February with audience members who had undisclosed, nefarious ties to Democrats. That network at least knew how to put the fix in.

Nielsen estimates that Fox's town hall with Sanders was watched by 2.5 million people who will never vote for the Vermont senator. It's like if the upcoming "Beetlejuice" musical was advertised during the Super Bowl. Any resulting commercial success is likely unrelated. Still, Trump probably feels betrayed that the network would deliver high ratings to anyone but himself. Bair offered to host a sloppy seconds town hall with the jilted president, but Trump doesn't really hang with Fox's pretend news anchors. The experience lacks the intimacy of calling in to Sean Hannity while in the safety of his underwear.

Trump later complained that Sanders benefitted from the GOP tax scam bill. Shouldn't he be glad someone has? He petulantly suggested that Sanders "give back" the tax cuts because that's how he thinks tax cuts work. You can apparently select "Fuck Me Like A Poor Person" on your 1040s as if it's the menu at a dominatrix nightclub.

Trump here is talking like a common gangster who helped "everyone" make a fortune and just wants some respect. However, after a quick glance around the room, we don't see anyone with a fortune, so maybe Trump just means everyone at Mar-a-Lago. Trump's big TAX CUTS were supposed to "create jobs" (they didn't so much). Is Trump so petty, he'd prefer Sanders kill jobs and surrender his hard-earned book tour money to the poor and shiftless?

The ratings success of the Sanders town hall has other Democrats giving the propaganda channel another look. Presidential candidates Pete Buttigieg, Eric Swalwell, and Tim Ryan (oh, yeah, that wasn't a joke) are all in talks for their own appeals to people who willingly watch Tucker Carlson. Trump is probably more concerned with losing his status as the network's favorite old white guy.

We know Trump has defiled the very concept of the presidency but must he talk about an actual presidential primary as if it's the Miss Universe pageant or "The Celebrity Apprentice"? Sanders and, if he actually runs, Joe Biden aren't just "finalists" in a competition to face off against the president of Random capitalization. We're talking about selecting the leader of the free world or whatever is left of it when 2020 rolls around.

[The Morning Call / Politico]

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He recently fled Seattle, where he did theatre work for Book-It Rep and Cafe Nordo.

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