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nice party you got here. would be a shame if something happened to it.


When you kick off your professional life with a cool one million dollars from Daddy (which you, laughably, characterized as a "small loan") and you file corporate bankruptcy and screw your creditors every time the going gets tough, you probably aren't really accustomed to working hard for a living. This might just explain why Donald Trump seems so furious that he'd be required to actually break a sweat in order to clinch the GOP nomination. He's pretty mad at Hillz for racking up the votes because clearly her primary is a cakewalk.

He's saving the bulk of his vitriol, though, for his own recently adopted party. First off, he's pretty pissed off that he didn't really seem to understand how the fuck Colorado's weird delegate nomination process worked.

“Colorado had an 'election' without voters,” Trump wrote. “Delegates were chosen on behalf of a presidential nominee, yet the people of Colorado were not able to cast their ballots to say which nominee they preferred.” [...]

In the op-ed, Trump accused “political insiders” of canceling the vote in Colorado and muting the voices of voters.

“Responsible leaders should be shocked by the idea that party officials can simply cancel elections in America if they don’t like what the voters may decide,” Trump wrote.

Urm. That is actually how party politics works. The party aka "political insiders" totally gets to decide how the nominee is chosen. Understanding this concept has been in distressingly short supply this election season. The RNC promptly reminded Trump that they'd explained how this all worked way back in October, but October was literally months ago. Who can keep track of things that long?

Stumping for the New York vote over the weekend, Trump decided to just stone cold menace the RNC, which, let's face it, is a stance we generally would applaud were it coming from anyone but Trump.

Trump is angry over the likelihood of a brokered convention, which means that he could be denied the nomination even if he wins the majority of votes.

“The system is rigged,” Trump said in Syracuse on Saturday, according to KCCI. “They gotta do something about it. The Republican National Committee better get going because I’ll tell you what, you’re gonna have a rough time at that convention in July … because people want to vote and the people wanna be represented properly.”

Do you think Trump even understands that he can't pack the actual GOP convention with his usual cast of mouth-breathing semi-literates? Like, has anyone explained to him that it will be the actual delegates who populate the thing? Should someone tell him? We don't want to be the ones to tell him.

Obviously, this "is Donald Trump gonna have to choke a bitch?" technique...

...generally works to ensure that The Donald gets his way. But Ted Cruz is not really scared of Donald Trump, perhaps because Trump isn't that scary, perhaps because Cruz is a sociopath who doesn't experience human emotions. Six of one, half a dozen of the other. And the RNC was scared of Trump but has now figured out that they can wave Paul Ryan or Scott Walker or one of the other less visibly crazy failed candidates around and maybe the delegates will come to their senses, relatively speaking. But Donald will continue threatening the party with nonspecific grievous bodily harm as long as Cruz keeps inching closer, particularly since Trump seems to have no idea how delegate math actually works.

Man, if he wins the GOP nod, he's going to be such a weird combination of sinister gangster and big bawling baby in the general, isn't he?? We can hardly wait.

[The Hill/Raw Story]

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photo by Dominic Gwinn

There was a time, a few months ago, when everyone had written off Elizabeth Warren. Well, not me, because I am a fabulous genius, but lots of other people. The "very reasonable" talking heads on all the various news channels, the kind of people who used to say things like "Oh, we'd like universal health care too, but 'the people' will never go for it!" but who definitely did not actually want universal health care for any reason, and even the Trump campaign. Though, to be fair, the Trump campaign didn't think Trump had much of a chance of winning in 2016 either.

But now, as more and more people hear her speak, hear her plans, hear what she wants to do and how she wants to do it... Elizabeth Warren is rising up in the polls. She's a contender. In the most recent Quinnipiac poll, she was closing in on Sanders for second place nationally, and in California and Nevada polls, she's in second place.

And now, according to a report from Politico, the Trump campaign is now scrambling and panicking and... stalking her?

Keep reading... Show less
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Spinal Tap - Gimme Some Money

Some dick is suing your Wonkette! If you are able, will you please send money?

1. Pick "just once" or "monthly."

2. Pick an amount, like say "all of the money."

3. Click "paypal" if you are paypal or "stripe" if you are not paypal.

4. MONEY.

5. Carry on with your day, and with new posts below!

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