Donald Trump Wants Ted Cruz, Tom Cotton To Join Supremes
Much better than a photo of Cruz or Cotton. (The Supremes in Amsterdam, 1965. Dutch National Archive)

Say what you will about Donald Trump's environmental record (yes, please do, and loudly!), he's at least committed to recycling. Especially when he can bring back campaign themes and gimmicks he thinks worked for him previously! Which is why, even with the economy in terrible shape, Trump keeps talking about the stock market, and why he's slapped a fresh glossy coat of racism on 2016's "MS-13 is coming to kill you!" to transform it into "Black Lives Matter is coming to kill you!" In yet another retread of a stunt from 2016, the Great Man yesterday announced an updated list of people he definitely wants to put on the Supreme Court, because evangelicals supposedly grooved on that four years ago.

But in a twist, Trump's list of 20 potential SCOTUS justices also included a few rightwing stars that people outside of the conservative legalsphere have also heard of: Republican Senators Ted Cruz, Tom Cotton, and Josh Hawley. (Mike Lee, from Utah, was already on the ever-growing list.) Cruz said he was very honored, insofar as "honor" means anything to a guy (Cruz) who sucks up to the guy (Trump) who told the National Enquirer to accuse his dad (Rafael Cruz) of killing JFK and called his (Cruz's) wife (Heidi) ugly. Cotton immediately tweeted that he is indeed very very qualified to be confirmed to Donald Trump's Supreme Court:

For his part, Hawley immediately noped out, and told Politico that in fact Trump just can't stop asking him to the prom, no matter how many times he's made it clear he'll be washing his hair and primping for a 2024 presidential run:

"He first broached this with me, it's been, oh, some weeks ago now," Hawley told POLITICO. "Well, we were talking about something and the Supreme Court came up … and he said, 'Oh Josh I'd like to put you on the list.' And I said, 'Oh no, I'm not interested,' and I had that same conversation with the White House counsel separately, and then separately with the chief of staff. And the president called me again today and he said I'd really like to put your name on the list, and I said I'm very honored by your confidence but I'm not interested."

Gosh, it's almost as if Donald Trump doesn't know what "no" means. That would certainly be consistent.

Others on the list include former Trump administration solicitor general Noel Francisco and a number of judges that Trump has already appointed to lower federal courts. They come pre-approved with the Federalist Society seal of approval, so they must be really good. (Politico has the whole list, nerds.)

Trump announced the list with great fanfare at the White House, explaining that every single person on his list would "ensure equal justice, equal treatment and equal rights for citizens of every race, color, religion and creed," as long as they don't want to have control over their own bodies or vote too much. In another line T,rump certainly didn't write himself, he said "Together we will defend our righteous heritage and preserve our magnificent American way of life." Then he pulled down his pants and shouted WHITE POWER! WHITE POWER! We assume.

Trump also warned that if Joe Biden becomes president, he will appoint only radical Marxist antifa jurists bent on not rubber-stamping Republican Party priorities. If the Court ever had a majority of justices appointed by Democrats, then America would be finished, because Joe Biden's justices would

"erase the Second Amendment, silence political speech and require taxpayers to fund extreme late-term abortion." They would also, he asserted, "give unelected bureaucrats the power to destroy millions of jobs" and "remove the words 'under God' from the Pledge of Allegiance" — despite Biden's never having proposed any of those things.

And God only knows what they'd do to make your toilets more difficult to flush.

Biden has so far not responded to Trump's demands to also release a list of potential nominees, although he has said he would appoint a Black woman to the Court, which prompted serious rightwing thinkers to complain he was politicizing the serious business of choosing an impartial judiciary.

In other news, Trump will probably announce today his plan to ban Muslims from the USA, make Mexico pay for WALL, and to require all Americans to greet each other by saying "Merry Christmas" year-round.

[CNBC / Politico / Photo: Dutch National Archive]

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Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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