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Y'all. Donald Trump and his family have ONE JOB today, and it is to vote for Donald Trump. Surprise, they're fucking it up in their own weird ways! Exhibit A is Trump himself voting next to his wife Melania and just kinda casually spying on her SECRET BALLOT to make sure she's not voting for Hillary Clinton. Maybe she did! We sure wouldn't blame her. Also, what an insecure, controlling, disgusting, pussy-grabbing bastard he is:


Of course, we all LOLed our faces off at how Trump got booed going in to his voting location and coming out of it, because guess who loves Trump in New York City besides Rudy Giuliani? NOBODY IS WHO. (For the record, Fox News reported the boos were actually cheers, because they are bracing for a rough fucking day right now.)

Want to watch those videos again? SI SE PUEDE!

Not to be outdone by his gross father, "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" villain Eric Trump also did a little peeky-peeky at his wife Lara doing her voting, because let's be honest: she, like Melania and probably Donald Jr.'s wife and Tiffany Trump and possibly even Ivanka at this point, may be voting for Hillary.

Oh, those Trump ladies! If they get caught voting for Hillary, we bet their sexually attractive husbands are going to "deny them" intercourse for a very long time!

But the rapey-looking Trump hellspawn Eric was not done fucking up, because he took a ballot selfie, which is NOT LEGAL in New York. He's deleted this tweet, according to The Verge, but INTERNETS IS FOREVER:

Dumb-dumb! Does Eric Trump not remember when Justin Timberlake went to prison for one thousand years for doing ballot selfies in Memphis? We don't actually care that little Eric did this, because everybody does it, but hey, we're LOLing at how dumb the Trump family is right now, therefore it is included.

We checked the other rapey-looking Trump son's Twitter and didn't see any direct evidence of him creeping on his wife or anything, but we're gonna guess he did, because he's so yucky.

Of course, today's bad voting experiences for the Trumps are nothing new. Remember back in the Republican primary when Eric and Ivanka couldn't vote for their dad, because they weren't registered Republicans? DOY DOY DOY DOY DOY!

Or here's another memorable thing! Remember that time in 2004 when Donald Trump and Billy Bush rode around together bein' silly, because the stupid orange fuckhead couldn't even figure out how to vote? Haha! Wonder what kind of sex crimes Trump admitted to Billy Bush when the camera was off THAT time!

Trump was SO ANGRY! He went to THREE VOTING PLACES and he wasn't registered anywhere. He threw a temper tantrum and had to do a provisional ballot, probably because they had to make sure he wasn't James O'Keefe pretending to be Donald Trump.

In other news, Mike Pence and his fambly "casted" their votes, probably for Jesus, and Hillary Rodham Clinton voted for herself like a goddamn normal human being who isn't bad at life and bad at America.

If you have not done so yet, please go vote, in order that we may never have to look at the tacky and brainless Trump family ever the fuck again.

[The Verge / Esquire]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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