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Hola Wonkers, you got a comfy spot to sit your rump, so you can watch the latest episode of Yay, Elizabeth Warren Ripped Donald Trump A New Bunghole? Of course you are! This one's not a speech -- she's done that already, and she'll do it again! It's also not a Twitter tirade, because pffffffft Twitter. Also, she has done that before too.

This, instead, is a video she created for the commie liberals at MoveOn.org. It is a very good video! You watch it now, we will do #spoilers after that.

I have to be honest. It is hard to talk about Donald Trump. Between his ignorance, his racism, his sexism, his lies, it is actually hard to know where to start!

Is she going to beat ass on all these subjects? Naw, she's got other shit to do. Here's what she wants to talk about:

Today I want to focus on one lie that helps to sum up what Trump is all about -- his taxes. We don't actually know what Donald Trump pays in taxes because he is the first presidential nominee in 40 years to refuse to disclose his tax return. [Video shows clips of Republicans suggesting that he's hiding something BIGLY.]

Look, maybe he's just a lousy businessman who doesn't want you to find out that he's worth a whole lot less money than he claims.

[wonkbar]<a href="http://wonkette.com/603228/hillary-clinton-cant-stop-laffing-at-piss-poor-businessman-donald-trump"></a>[/wonkbar]It's funny because we know for a fact that he is a lousy businessman, and that he's also bad at finding dollars for his flailing campaign. It's also funny because Hillary just came out with an ad that says the SAME DAMN THING. That, kiddos, is what's called being On Message, and it is a thing campaigns can do when they have more than two nickels to rub together. Donald J. Trump cannot do that, awwwww.

GO ON, ELIZABETH:

The last time Donald Trump's taxes were made public, it turned out that Donald Trump paid nothing in federal taxes. ZERO. Zero taxes before, and for all we know, he's paying zero taxes today. And he's proud of it. [...] Trump likes being a billionaire, and he doesn't think the rules that apply to everyone else should apply to him. But let's be clear. Donald Trump didn't get rich on his own.

Liz then ticks off a list of all the ways Donald Trump Didn't Build That, along the same lines as President Obama's famous talk about You Didn't Build That. It's a good and true message, because there are ALL THESE THINGS our tax dollars pay for, like police and fire and roads and the military, and if those things didn't exist, Trump wouldn't even be ABLE to create scammy "universities" to take people's hard-earned moneys and roll it around between his greasy short fingers.

Liz has more shit to talk. How did Trump actually get rich?

He inherited a fortune from his father, and kept it going by scamming people, declaring bankruptcy, and skipping out on what he owed. Nurses, teachers, dock workers, they pay their fair share for the services that keep Trump's businesses going. Programmers and engineers, small business owners, they pay their fair share ...

Donald Trump thinks that supporting them is "throwing money down the drain"? I say we just throw Donald Trump down the drain! Donald Trump is a fraud, and a cheapskate, and he's a bully.

So what do we do, Sen. Warren? Do we talk to strangers about how much Donald Trump sucks a big donkey scrotum? Yes, we do!

Speak out. Talk to the person behind you in the grocery store. Talk to the person pumping gas next to you. ... Ask your Fox News-loving Republican uncle, "Why do YOU pay your taxes, and Donald Trump doesn't?"

You have your assignment from your general, ladies and gentlemen! You all go to the Big Lots RIGHT NOW and tell everybody about Donald Trump's tiny hands and how They Didn't Build That, and also about his tax returns, using the script Warren provided. And try not to get beat up, because Trump supporters are pigs.

[The New Civil Rights Movement]

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Lace up your sneakers, Wonkers! Time to hit the streets. MoveOn, the ACLU, MomsRising and all your favorite dirty leftists are getting together for a yuuuuuuuuge march to show that WE ARE A NATION OF DECENT FUCKING HUMAN BEINGS WHO DON'T KIDNAP BABIES. And your Wonkette will be there!

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Rudy Giuliani, flapping his loose yap to Politico on Monday:

President Donald Trump's attorney Rudy Giuliani said on Monday that he was actually just bluffing last week when he called for Justice Department leaders to suspend special counsel Robert Mueller's investigation within 24 hours.

"I didn't think it would," Giuliani told POLITICO with a laugh when asked about the Mueller inquiry's still being very much an active investigation. "But I still think it should be." [...]

That's what I'm supposed to do," Giuliani explained on Monday. "What am I supposed to say? That they should investigate him forever? Sorry, I'm not a sucker."

Cool, that is just Rudy Giuliani admitting he's full of shit and words and more shit and more words (and also a noun, a verb and 9/11). We are guessing therefore that Giuliani, who is a lawyer, would legally advise us to continue assuming we should take his every oral ejaculation with a gi-normous grain of FULL OF SHIT.

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