Emergency Backup Livebloog!

Haha, we have no idea how Rebecca broke the internet! But here we are!

10:56 OMG Barry is totally doing a clip show here!

10:59 This, fellow students of Rhetoric, is what ya call a "peroration." And it freakin' ROCKS.

11:02 "Hello, Sailor" jokes will only be allowed for the next 17 minutes. After that, the site breaks again.

11:05 Whew...we have fixed the Wonket, for now. And now my PBS digital signal is going kerflooey. At least I have beer.

11:07 We see. The Teevee came back on, and then the speech was over. This is a handsome family, is it not? The tweeterz are saying they are not in love with the speech. It got us going in places. Citizenship, beeyotchez!

11:09 Hey, folks, Rebecca really does need to know: Should she wash her armpits and put on a red dress and go downtown (WHICH INVOLVES LIGHT RAIL, AND WALKING) or should she just lie there on the couch some more?

11:12 David Brooks is making our beer taste funny, so now we will listen to the DNC livestream where Kal Penn is... uh... also quite boring, actually.

11:15 Ah, OK, CSPAN. "Forever Amen." We just heard the best part of the awful Cardinal's thing, we think.

11:17 Antoinne Vinaigrette is a placeholder here. He's entertaining a motion. It is paradoxically not entertaining.

11:20 Here is a thing! Were you watching Barack's teeth? We were not, in between listening and trying to fix the whole internet that our Editrix broke. Which maybe includes Twitter now?

11: 25 No, apparently Twitter works, because we just saw a tweet from Jim Newell:

I'm still sad that Gary Johnson wasn't able to borrow Wonkette's convention pass last night from the editor on acid whose phone was dead

AP Fact-checkers are looking into this.

11:29 Fox News analyst Monica Crowley tweets:

"Clinton gave a barnburner last night so Obama would look lame by comparison. It worked. "

Ana Marie Cox replies, "// Yes this is exactly how that worked. " We have never actually heard the sound of eyes rolling through our computer speakers before. How did she do that?

11:33 On C-SPAN, "Sally from Sun City" called to say she does not like Barack Obama, especially the way he is bringing all the troops home, because we are going to have a war right here! We feel just a little bad mocking her, but not that bad. Haha, she's a dope, really.

11:39 HAHA! The Obama campaign bought some kind of Twitter ad that will pop up if you Tweetz about search for the term "Literally."We don't really understand what this is, We understand this, and misread the article the first time, but it is good. Opportunistic, maybe.

11:42 Caller to C-SPAN just pointed out that "we are not a democracy, we are a Constitutional Republic, and it seems people DO NOT UNDERSTAND THIS." We think people like this are a national treasure. Literally.

11:50 Andrew Sullivan's livebloog wrap-up: "I don't think it was a game-changer. I do think it sets an optimistic tone for the campaign and a stark choice for Americans this fall."

11:52 Just noticed that, for the first time [since] we have been reading Your Wonkette, an obscenity-laced test comment is the highest-rated comment. USA!! USA!! USA!! USA!!

11:55 Nerdy fun! Word clouds for Romney's speech and Barry's speech

12:15 It is after midnight for you silly people in Eastern time, and so we are going to wrap up. Editrix has apparently "headed out for a smoke," which, with the kind of day she's been having, means that people in the Charlotte NC area should prepare for either a massive wildfire, or, we don't know, maybe a plague of frogs. Very, very stoned frogs. We wish you luck. The DNC is, as they say, all over but the animated .gifs, so here is one of those, too:


12:25 We lied about shutting down the liveblog, because we just have to quote commenter ChernobylSoup FOR TRUTH:

"DNC 2012 - Four days of not running away from liberal ideals."

OK, now we are shutting down the liveblog.

12:28 Fact Check: Three days, actually. We are really, really tired but not all that beery.

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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