Endless Campaign Means Endless Campaign Staffer Sex!
Today's Wall Street Journal broadsheet features a delightful feature about the endless Democratic primary's steamy silver-lining: hot cross-campaign-pollinating sexy times. Rowr! As the Journal notes, "The most heated presidential primary in recent history has drawn a record number of new voters, galvanized young Americans and forced the nation to confront deep-rooted race and gender issues. It also got Brendan Gilfillan a girlfriend." Brendan Gilfillan, you sluuuuuut!
Strange things happened to Brendan Gilfillan in those corn fields of Iowa on a cold night (of corn):
The 25-year-old campaign staffer for Sen. Hillary Clinton met 23-year-old field organizer Kat Atwater while they were both working in Linn County, Iowa. "I assumed I was getting a vibe off her but never really made a move," he says. Finally, Ms. Atwater broke down the situation. "She said, 'Look, dummy, we've only got 16 days until the caucus,' " Mr. Gilfillan says.
You know what happened next!
But some sexy times on the campaign trail aren't as innocent as the Gilfillan/Atwater love fest. Mostly these involve Paultards, the boning scourge of the trail. The 3-4 Paultards that are sexually active, it seems, have commitment issues that lead to them fucking Ron Paul's granddaughter:
Jesse Benton, 30, had a serious girlfriend in Washington when he signed up to be communications director for Texas Rep. Ron Paul. That quickly ended when she complained about his being on the road so much, he says.
Several months later Mr. Benton was spotted kissing Mr. Paul's granddaughter and fellow campaign staffer, Valori Pyeatt, 22, in a hallway of the Des Moines Marriott. "It's uncentering to have no real routine, but it's also liberating. It lets your passions out," says Mr. Benton, who is now engaged to Ms. Pyeatt. The two plan to marry in Texas in August.
Indeed, it is "uncentering" to cheat on your girlfriend with Ron Paul's granddaughter.
Campaign Hook-Ups [WSJ]