You really have to feel sorry for poor Eric Trump, who has been having a crappy couple of weeks (fact check: you do not). Last week he and his idiot brother dropped plans to develop two new hotel chains, because the media and Democrats RUINED EVERYTHING. And today, Eric got terribly pissy about a Bloomberg story that made his daddy look like the financially shaky deadbeat that everyone except his dumb supporters (and kids) already thinks he is. The Bloomberg story reveals executives at Deutsche Bank, the only institution dumb enough to loan his dad hundreds of millions, once considered extending the repayment date on some huge loans to Donald Trump to at least 2025. That way, if Trump defaulted on the loans, at least it wouldn't happen during his presidency and become even more embarrassing for Deutsche Bank.


Here's the meat of the story, which isn't really our focus but is nonetheless fun because it's yet another example of Donald Trump's Reverse Midas Touch, in which everything he gets involved with turns to shit, like his business, his "presidency," and his children.

Members of the bank's management board, including then Chief Executive Officer John Cryan, were leery of the public relations disaster they would face if they went after the assets of a sitting president [...]

The bank ultimately decided against restructuring the loans to the Trump Organization, which come due in 2023 and 2024, and chose instead not to do any new business with Trump while he is president

The story is careful to mention that the anonymous insiders made clear those worries had nothing to do with any specific "concerns about the creditworthiness of Trump or his company," but instead only involved the potential damaging PR for the bank.

A Deutsche Bank spokesperson wouldn't comment, but Eric Trump sure did, and he was MAD, because how dare you imply Donald Trump might ever make bankers nervous! In an email, Eric fumed

This story is complete nonsense [...] We are one of the most under-leveraged real estate companies in the country. Virtually all of our assets are owned free and clear, and the very few that do have mortgages are a small fraction relative to the value of the asset. These are traditional loans, no different than any other real estate developer would carry as part of a comparable portfolio.

Notice how he doesn't actually deny any of the claims in the story, because whatever he thinks about his wonderful family's wonderful liquidity, there's nothing in the Bloomberg story about Deutsche Bank telling the Trump Organization any of this, so how the fuck would he even know what the executives were thinking? And besides, Donald Trump is an honorable man who always pays his bills, except when he doesn't wanna.

Still, it is very sad that members of the disloyal media would even report a story based on the anonymous claims of anonymous insiders, so by golly, someone ought to let Eric Trump sue over this mean mean story.

[Bloomberg via Vanity Fair]

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Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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