Everybody Hates Bill Barr And His Stupid Sh*t-Mouthed Face

The reviews are in on Attorney General Bill Barr deciding that Michael Flynn, a man who pleaded guilty TWICE to lying to the FBI, and also pleaded to all kinds of other literal actual foreign agent shit in his sweet plea deal, deserves to have his charges dropped, because he is BFFs with the Criminal-In-Chief. Did we mention Flynn pleaded guilty TWICE? And that the judge on the case looked at all the information and determined that Flynn's plea was totally real and good and valid and correct?

Surprise, the reviews for Barr's latest performance are BAD. He hasn't gotten this kind of reception since ... um, since the last time he intervened in a criminal case against one of Donald Trump's best criminal friends who is a convicted criminal!

Let us tick through the shit reviews as briefly as we can.

2,000 Former DOJ Officials Hate Bill Barr And His Stupid Face

Approximately 2,000 former DOJ officials (so far) have signed an open letter calling for Bill Barr to take his low-rent Roy Cohn wannabe ass back to whatever backward hellscape he crawled out from. The letter goes over the brief facts (FACTS) of the Flynn case, notes that this is now part of a pattern with Bill Barr, and then gets to the point:

Despite previously acknowledging that he "had to fire General Flynn because he lied to the Vice President and the FBI," President Trump has repeatedly and publicly complained that Flynn has been mistreated and subjected to a "witch hunt." The President has also said that Flynn was "essentially exonerated" and that he was "strongly considering a [f]ull [p]ardon." The Department has now moved to dismiss the charges against Flynn, in a filing signed by a single political appointee and no career prosecutors. The Department's purported justification for doing so does not hold up to scrutiny, given the ample evidence that the investigation was well-founded and — more importantly — the fact that Flynn admitted under oath and in open court that he told material lies to the FBI in violation of longstanding federal law.

Make no mistake: The Department's action is extraordinarily rare, if not unprecedented. If any of us, or anyone reading this statement who is not a friend of the President, were to lie to federal investigators in the course of a properly predicated counterintelligence investigation, and admit we did so under oath, we would be prosecuted for it.

These former officials — did we mention it is TWO THOUSAND of them? — close by encouraging Judge Emmet Sullivan, who just adores Michael Flynn and his batshit Fox News emoji warcrime lawyer, to actually hold an evidentiary hearing on DOJ's bullshit FLYNN TOTALLY EXONERATED!11! filing, and if it turns out to be as bullshit as it obviously is, deny their motion and sentence the motherfucker.

While it is rare for a court to deny the Department's request to dismiss an indictment, if ever there were a case where the public interest counseled the court to take a long, hard look at the government's explanation and the evidence, it is this one. Attorney General Barr's repeated actions to use the Department as a tool to further President Trump's personal and political interests have undermined any claim to the deference that courts usually apply to the Department's decisions about whether or not to prosecute a case.

They note that they called for the fucker to resign last time, and that he should still do so. Moreover, they are calling on Congress to hold Barr accountable for his "abuses of power."

It is a good letter. Read it.

Dunno If This Roger Stone Prosecutor Hates Bill Barr's Stupid Face, But Probably

Jonathan Kravis was one of the prosecutors on the Roger Stone case, and he resigned when Bill Barr pulled this shit last time. This time, he is writing in the Washington Post about what an un-American piece of shit Bill Barr is being this time.

Kravis notes, like the DOJ letter above notes, that none of the actual prosecutors on the Flynn case were willing to sign Barr's latest shitstain-on-paper filing. No self-respecting prosecutor who loves America would.

Kravis also goes after Barr for the shit he says in public, undermining the work of the prosecutors at the department he is supposed to be leading:

William P. Barr gave nationally televised interviews in which he disparaged the work of prosecutors and agents who handled these cases, criticizing the Stone prosecutors for losing "perspective" and the Flynn team for becoming "wedded to a particular outcome."

As the attorney general knows, those career prosecutors and agents cannot respond. The department prohibits employees from talking to the media about criminal cases without high-level approval. Department lawyers are ethically bound to protect the confidences of their client. Barr's decision to excuse himself from these obligations and attack his own silenced employees is alarming. It sends an unmistakable message to prosecutors and agents — if the president demands, we will throw you under the bus.

The dedicated public servants who remain cannot respond publicly to those who claim that the department acted appropriately in these cases. But I can, and I say this. If the department truly acted because of good-faith commitments to legal positions, then where is the evidence of those commitments in other cases that do not involve friends of the president?

LOLOL it's funny because it's a rhetorical question. We know that Barr and his fellow GOP cronies are bonered up to do some major racist "justice" to any defendants who fall into categories of people Trump doesn't like.

Read that whole thing too!

This Former Acting Assistant Attorney General Sounds Like She Really Hates Bill Barr's Stupid Face Too

Mary McCord was the acting assistant attorney general for national security during the time when Michael Flynn was committing his crimes. And she is not happy with how she is represented among the so-called "new" "evidence" in Bill Barr's very legal and very cool filing about how Flynn is just the best little foreign agent who ever did lie to the FBI about his secret contacts with the Russian government. You see, the "new" "evidence" cites an FBI interview McCord did in 2017 very many times, and forms a linchpin of Barr's "argument."

Would you be shocked to learn Barr and his lackey Timothy Shea who now runs the DC US attorney's office pretty much outright lied about everything McCord said? Nope, you would not, because Bill Barr is a known and frequent liar.

McCord writes in the New York Times:

[T]he report of my interview is no support for Mr. Barr's dismissal of the Flynn case. It does not suggest that the F.B.I. had no counterintelligence reason for investigating Mr. Flynn. It does not suggest that the F.B.I.'s interview of Mr. Flynn — which led to the false-statements charge — was unlawful or unjustified. It does not support that Mr. Flynn's false statements were not material. And it does not support the Justice Department's assertion that the continued prosecution of the case against Mr. Flynn, who pleaded guilty to knowingly making material false statements to the FBI, "would not serve the interests of justice."

McCord goes chapter-and-verse through how Barr and Shea misused her words, noting that DOJ markedly does not argue that Flynn's constitutional rights were violated, but that they are hanging their hat on the BS notion that Flynn's call with the Russian ambassador about sanctions relief was a PERFECT CALL READ TEHT TRRANSCRENASSDFADSUFIDPAT! Therefore, they say the investigation of Flynn should not have continued when they found out he was lying to everyone about his back-channel calls with the Russian ambassador.

McCord had some disagreements with the FBI, she writes, "about what to do with the information that Mr. Flynn apparently had lied to the incoming vice president, [Mike] Pence, and others in the incoming administration about whether he had discussed the Obama administration's sanctions against Russia in his calls with Mr. Kislyak." This was important because it meant Flynn was super-compromised and could be blackmailed by the Russians, because while Pence and other Trump idiots might be out there saying false fibs about what Flynn and the Russians talked about, Russia knew the truth.

Justice wanted to tell Trump and his people that HOLYSHIT the new national security advisor is totally compromised. (Remember Sally Yates, who did just that?) FBI was more like Ummmmmmm maybe we shouldn't tell them that until we investigate some more and see how deep this shit goes? Hey, pop quiz: Did you know FBI and Justice fight a lot, like, in every administration, about all kinds of shit? What McCord was describing was totally normal.

She just didn't like how FBI had handled setting up the Flynn interview. She didn't say it was WITCH RUSSIA HOAX HUNT FAKE NEWS OBAMA NETFLIX, like Barr and Shea basically write in their dumbass filing.

So STFU, Bill Barr.

That Nice Man Chuck Rosenberg From The MSNBC, Who Ran The DEA? He's Too Nice To Hate People, But Maybe He Is Making An Exception For Bill Barr's Stupid Face

Wanna read another op-ed about Go Fuck Yourself, Bill Barr?

Chuck Rosenberg got you one in the Washington Post, about the long list of people who thought ACTUALLY Michael Flynn's lies to the FBI were absolutely material to an ongoing important investigation into just how compromised by Russia the Trump administration is. So stuff that up Trump's ass and smoke it, Bill Barr.

In Summary And In Conclusion, Here Is Kamala Harris Hating Bill Barr's Stupid Face On Live TV

You might have heard Barack Hussein NoBummer NoNever had some real pointed comments this weekend about what Bill Barr is doing to the rule of law right now, but have you seen KAMALA IS A COP call for Barr to to eat shit in hell at his earliest convenience?

It is a good video, and features a nice clip of one time Harris beat Barr's ass during a Senate hearing.

Sen. Kamala Harris Renews Call For Attorney General Barr To Resign | Deadline | MSNBCwww.youtube.com

People are saying that woman might end up being the vice president before this is all over. We're here for it.

In conclusion, everybody hates Bill Barr and his stupid face.

Now go read Dahlia Lithwick on why all these mean "10 Things I Hate About Bill Barr" letters are nice, but it's time for current DOJ people to go li'l more apeshit. We are also here for that.


[Former DOJ letter / Washington Post / New York Times]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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