Everybody Hurts Sometimes. Even Brad Parscale's Neckbeard :(
This is a funny and joyful post.
OMG sad neckbeard so sad now, ever since Donald Trump coughed him up like a big hairball what got caught in his throat:
Romans 12: 14: Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them.
— Brad Parscale (@Brad Parscale) 1594918357.0
LOLOL the Bible is hilarious.
in response everybody is sending encouraging Bible verses right back at 'im, because go fuck yourself with your fake martyrdom, you dumb neckbeard. This is our favorite so far:
@parscale John 8: 44: You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desires. He was… https://t.co/nHjJeud5i6
— Alexandra Chalupa (@Alexandra Chalupa) 1594920542.0
The news is starting to report on Brad Parscale's feelings after he got yanked off his Trump campaign manager pedestal (by his neckbeard) and replaced with some other shitweasel named Bill Stepien. (The real campaign manager is still obviously Jared, which tells you how much success is really coming down the path for Trump.)
Anyway, it's pretty funny news, about Brad. Make us laugh, Politico:
Those close to Parscale expressed unhappiness at how the late-night shakeup played out. Trump's family, which has long been close to the ex-campaign manager, felt blindsided by the move, two people with knowledge of their reaction said.
They also described Parscale as deeply hurt.
Hahaha, point and laugh.
Axios has more funnies, reporting that this all happened because of a bunch of new shitty polls, especially Fox News polls. Fox News is supposed to be Trump's friend and sit with him at lunch! But their polls pretend like they don't even know him. : (
Thing is, Trump's licking the bottom of the toilet in the Fox News polls, but he's doing that in all of 'em. He's losing by 15 in Quinnipiac! That's the first poll we know of to show that big a number, but that recent poll from CNN that made the Trump campaign GRRR ANGRY had him down 14, and honestly, there is no credible poll that shows anything but Trump losing his ass to Joe Biden. The Fox News polls have had him down by double digits, and so has the New York Times. Really, in our media hellscape, the only thing people agree on is that Trump issucking walrus taint in the polls, which is a scientific way of saying "losing."
Politico reports Brad is going back to Florida now, even though he is still technically a "senior advisor" to the campaign, which sounds like one of those fake titles you give to some loser you just want to go away. "Sure, he can call himself Emperor Space Princess for all we care, as long as he GTFO," that's a thing they maybe say on the Trump campaign.
Trump blamed his Tulsa shitshow on Brad, because he never blames anything on himself. Trump has been blaming his bad poll numbers on Brad, even though the actual biggest problem with the Trump campaign is that they haven't replaced the top-of-ticket with somebody who's fit to be president.
That said, Axios notes this:
Trump really can't fire Brad: He knows too much, and he built the digital infrastructure the campaign relies on.
Oh well, Trump better hope Brad doesn't cry into 100 boxes of Oreos tonight and then go Breaking Brad and start spilling to reporters who call him on the telephone. He seems pretty sad right now.
LOL.
Open thread!
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Berke Breathed took several broadside swipes at Trump.