AG Bill Barr dropped a letter on House Judiciary chair Jerry Nadler late Friday saying he will get "some" of the Mueller report to Congress by "mid-April." This is obviously not Jerry Nadler's deadline of April 2, so we imagine Nadler is on the phone right now telling Barr he can expect "some" of Jerry Nadler's foot up his ass by "when it happens, you'll know it."

Oh, but let us tell you, Barr seems STUNG. It's almost like maybe he's starting to realize that exonerating the president, which was not his job to do, and then trying to do a full cover-up in plain sight, were perhaps not his wisest course of action. Here is the letter, as tweeted by NBC News:

You can click to embiggen that, but here is the news Barr made, some of which is OK, some of which is FUCKING GIVE IT, ASSHOLE:

1. He says he and Mueller are working together on the redactions.

2. They are redacting: A) 6(e) material, which covers grand jury secrecy, and which Barr could go to a judge on Monday and secure the release of. B) Stuff the intel community says compromises sources and methods (that is fine). C) Stuff that could compromise ongoing investigations, including cases Mueller transferred out of his office (also fine). D) Info that could "unduly infringe on the personal privacy and reputational interests of peripheral third parties." And that is where there could be some big fucking issues, because exactly who in the hell is "peripheral," Bill? Is it Donald Trump Jr., who has no reputation to uphold, and who is at the center of the coordination and collusion and cahoots with the Russians, even if Mueller couldn't prove conspiracy beyond a reasonable doubt? Is it Fucking Jared? Or is it people who are actually peripheral and do not matter? Do not fuck around, Mister Attorney General, for Jerry Nadler will know you did.

3. Barr says he won't be submitting the report to the White House for a privilege review. He would say that, wouldn't he.

4. Barr is just TAKEN ABACK by everybody acting like his four page letter was some kind of IN SUMMARY AND IN CONCLUSION of the Mueller report, because he meant it to be no such thing! He wants you to read the thing! Honest, officer! It's 400 pages long! Plus tables and appendices! Stop saying he's doing a cover-up, it hurts his feelings!

5. Barr would just love to testify for Congress, as soon as he's done washing his hair, which will not possibly be done before May.

Oh by the way, Nadler spoke to Barr this week, and confirms that Barr will not commit to going to a judge to get the grand jury testimonies released, so ... um, yeah, ERRBODY 'BOUT TA SCRAP.

Also, Nadler is still not amused.

If the attorney general is reading this post right now, he is obviously free to paste a link to the full, unredacted report in the comments, which are not allowed.

Stay tuned, watch this space, and now the news cycle is free to go fuck itself, because it is the weekend!

Unless Bill Barr wants to FUCKING GIVE IT.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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