Fishy Life Hacks From People With Questionable Morals. Tabs, Wed., May 5, 2021

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Tabs gifs by your friend Martini Ambassador!

Hola Wonkers of love, I took Sunday night tabs off, did you miss me, shut up, yes you did. What are we reading today, let's discover!

LOL YOU GUYS I AM DYING OF LOLS. "Trump launches new communications platform months after Twitter, Facebook ban," says Fox News. Oh, did he succeed where Mike Lindell keeps failing? No, no need to click it, the answer is it took them all this time to put a blog page for him to fake-tweet on, on the website he already had.

Apropos of nothing: Creed Thoughts. (Web Archive)

Help Wanted: Non-Threatening Female. (Speaker.gov) Apparently Nancy Pelosi already had a "communications platform" and didn't even have to get kicked off Facebook and Twitter to start it. (Speaker.gov blog) I kind of wish they all would leave it to the professionals, the professionals is me.

Also a professional is Joy Reid. (*Doffs cap*) Ma'am.


Kevin McCarthy, Master of Strategery. Mean snidenesses from The Bulwark! Liz Cheney, poking the Trumpian bear. From the other side of the aisle, it's the Maddowblog!

Well I guess Dean Baquet bought that house in LA's Hancock Park for nothing, since the LA Times just hired Kevin Merida as its new EIC. (Poynter)

Georgia's purging some voters, but despite the headline it seems like they might be *lawful* purges? They're using data from ERIC, operated by NYU's Brennan Center, to see who's moved out of state, instead of doing it like Kris Kobach-CROSSCHECK-style. Somebody better do something about Georgia Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger; first he got a paper trail on ballots, then he refused to find the fake votes, and now this. (AJC)

More on that billion dollar deli company that does $30k in business every two years, but with stuff about SPACs and junk bonds and whatnots that I don't understand. But DID YOU KNOW Duke University and Vanderbilt University are invested in it? That seems un-smrt. — Cory Doctorow's Pluralistic

Joe Biden being so mean to the riches, will "rip billions" from heirs upon their benefactors' deaths, might even make them pay up the $7 trillion in taxes they evaded over the decade.

Oh noooooo :(

Jeff Bezos has an ex-wife, a girlfriend, four children and billions of reasons to watch whether Joe Biden's tax overhaul wins congressional approval.

The Amazon.com Inc. founder's heirs may have to pay more than $36 billion if the president succeeds in closing a loophole that helps the rich transfer much of their fortunes tax-free at death.

Did I say "oh nooooo"? I meant LOLOLOLOLOL. — Bloomberg

Here's a very Buzzfeedy kind of listicle about Bill Gates's daughter Jennifer, I got bored and stopped reading. But she's cute! She's probably fine. Who cares, it's a tab that I had open. (Business Insider)

Whom will Bill Gates gates next? Here's a rather odd list from the betting people! — SportsBetting.ag

Airline passengers being TURRIBLE MURIEL. Wasn't me! I was very good on my flights to and from Detroit this weekend, and was in fact impressed with all the good manners on all the passengers around me! They even told the sky waitresses thank you, A LOT. (NBC News)

Ellis Weiner taste-tested all the fakeburgers, and yet somehow I can't come up with a play on fakeburgers and "weiner." Some fucking dick joke emporium. (Ellis Weiner)

Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

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Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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