Fox & Friends: God Hates Feminists
Attention ladies! Do you know what you want, what you really really want? Probably not, so how about you listen to these three hotties – WHOM YR WONKETTE RESPECTS FOR THEIR MINDS AS WELL AS THEIR FEMININITY – yap at you about some feminist idea or other that’s floating through their well-coiffed heads while they show some leg to the geriatric shut-ins who make up the Fox & Friends audience.
The ladies – Ann-Marie Murrell, Morgan Brittany and Dr. Gina Loudon – have written a new book called What Women Really Want, which purports to femsplain how feminists have hijacked what it means to be a woman. Or something. Like so many arguments about What Feminism Is Today, it devolves quickly into a lot of chaff meant to distract from the good old-fashioned liberal bashing that is part of the book’s agenda. (What Women Really Want is published by WND Books, which is part of the World Net Daily empire, so you know we’re dealing with some real intellects here.)
Did we say devolve? We meant that the interview starts at rock bottom and tries to burrow into the rock, starting with adorable moppet guest-host Anna Kooiman asking, “Feminists claim they help empower women but are they really suppressing them?” Followed by some whining with Murrell about nuh-uh, conservatives aren’t intolerant, feminists are the intolerant ones, they don’t want to empower women because the ladies already have the right to vote and equality in the workplace (sure they do) and today’s feminism is concerned only with “the head down.” Sure, drawing attention to looks and not brains is totally part of the feminist agenda, as we have heard recently. This kind of argument right now is working for the GOP about as well as the “liberals are the real racists” trope is working at bringing in all the minority voters, so you guys keep at it and Hillary Clinton definitely will lose to Ted Cruz in 2016.
Then it is time for the opinion of Morgan Brittany, former child actor in godless Hollywood, who gets a question so blatantly leading she might as well be a horse getting walked around a paddock.
KOOIMAN: Morgan, would you say the left is tolerant as long as you agree with them a hundred percent?
BRITTANY: Oh absolutely, absolutely…It was liberal Hollywood, and I saw it get more and more and more liberal and push an agenda, and our culture started to deteriorate.
And she used to be a Democrat, so you know this must be true!
Finally, Dr. Gina Loudon brings it all home.
We’re here with a new brand of feminism, saying “Drop the shackles of the old feminism.” It’s time for women who really want to be women, who want to be feminine, who want to be what God designed them to be, we are here to say that it’s time for that era.
So there you have it, ladies: the Fourth Wave of feminism will be following God’s plan, and also the empowerment to make your own choices without government interference in your lives, unless that choice involves the health and welfare of your ladyparts, in which case God will tell you through the elected conservatives in government who are His instruments what you can and cannot do with your uterus.
Also, the lady authors would like all you wimpy beta males to quit shaving, because they love real men who don’t shave or something. At which point all the men on the Fox & Friends production crew began hopping around the studio and hooting while throwing croissants from the craft services table at each other in a manly quest for dominance.